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Tech Stories Archives - November 2003
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3.
Interpretation
I've decided to switch off my bullshit interpreter for the day. For instance, an email just received.....How do i get connected to <ISP package> through a laptop with no floppy disc drive? .......... what she means is cdrom drive / to run our setup disk. My reply ..... Dear Madam, the entire process of <ISP name> registration, installation and general use does not require you to have a floppy disk drive. In fact, we don't supply any software on floppy disks. Therefore you should be able to register for <package> in the usual way, using one of our CD-Roms..... ; ). I'm sick of customers who use terms they don't understand.
[By: Dood / 2003-11-01]
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I wouldn't have done it any differently. Just answer their exact question. You can't be blamed for doing anything wrong because it was what she asked. - techskier
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4.
schedule
So we recently switched from tenure based scedules to performance based ones. Not so bad really, except that every one I've asked, no matter how good their stats is being bumped out of the starting window they wanted. In fact most of us have start times for the next week varying between 6:30am and 1:30PM. (I have started between 6am and 7am for more than a year.) I think Managment has just gone too far. I didn't complain when they cut our days shorter by half an hour, even though that ment that even with the raise I got I was not making any more. I always volunteer if they need extra agents on the floor. I didn't get angry when they informed me that the overtime hours don't count as hours worked because I volunteered. I don't even complain when they Fark up the payroll as long as they fix it within a couple of days. As of tomorrow I'm handing in my notice. So it looks like the job search is on. Wish me luck...In this town where I work is pretty much it for tech jobs that pay decently.[By: samurai / 2003-11-01]
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They did that to us about a year ago and works Ok, though they don't give enough weight to seniority. The problem I have with it, is the system is flawed in many ways and when we point this out to management their argue meant is that it works out in the end, because every will eventually get screwed. -MightyMouse
If only tech call centre managers were ex-techs. If they had to take one farking call and speak to these muppets they'd empathise a little more and stop shunting shifts around and harping on about stats. Goddam stats drive me crazy, The duration of my calls is directly proportional to the stupidity of the EU and nothing else. You cannot improve my acd by sitting me in a rooom and boring me for three hours with company mission statements and 'fun' motivational games. -Dood
Yeah I wouldn't mind as much if they gave any consideration to tenure, but they don't! -samurai
sam, if you are in SD, Cal-there is a job opening where I work. send me an email if interested. billybien@yahoo.com -billybien
Samuri must be in the same center as me.. -aNoid
Similar centre to me, but I'm not too picky with my start times so long as I can be out of here before busses end.
-Warrick
It might not be so bad if I didn't have labs to attend at the college. Clases can be blown off. labs can't be. -samurai
they still use senority here (thankfully) but they have talked about using stats. We made it quite clear that we would go job hunting if they did that..... -leonine
Not cool. I'd ask if there were anything else around you could commute to, but there are those labs to deal with. Good luck. -snowcrash
My only real motivation is not to get hasseled. And in the end that will only make you work just hard enough not to get fired. -scooby111
agreed - i dont care what i work as long as i can bus home and the team leads leave me alone. -Harm
where I work we can't figure out any rhyme or reason to the scheduling, seems like the new techs and the old folks they've hired get the day shifts and the rest of us get nights and after 4 years, I've had it with night shifts but no matter how much I complain it doesn't do any good, I might as well tell the Bay of Fundy to warm up by 15 degrees, would do as much good. -Axiom
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5.
scheduling....
I walk in the door at 7:01 yesterday morning (fashionably late as usual) and look around. Our department is COMPLETELY EMPTY!!! Calls start comming into our building at 7am and the que is starting to back up. Didn't bother to ask the manager what was going on, just logged in and started taking calls as normal. We are usally in que constantly so I wasn't really consered with the apparent staffing issue (let the managers panic). Found out later that the POS software they've been trying to use to magically reduce our hold times only had 2 people scheduled and one of them was on vacation. They keep trying to deny it but the only way to reduse hold times is to HIRE MORE PEOPLE.... hopefully, they will figure it out before they lose the rest of their good techs (including me).[By: leonine / 2003-11-01]
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Aww criminey Leonine... please don't tell me you're working for teh same company I am. (email me at Warrick1@rogers.com if you wanna tell me which company you are working for) -Warrick
YUp- i know this one...
i have a Feeling Warwick and I are working for thesame tech company - and it is infamouse for "denieing staffing problems."
we need you to take MORE calls.. we dont need more people.... -Harm
... it's Warrick dude :) Meh.
-Warrick
I thought that was all companies. -scooby111
My bad - cranked bad a few too mant bottles of BAWLS in order to combat the hangover / sleep deprivation due to the hallowe'en party.
i realised my mistake shortly after posting .. my bad... -Harm
" we need you to take MORE calls.. we dont need more people.... " Isn't that the ethos of EVERY PHB/beancounter/HR droid? -lineswine
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6.
cheap bastards
Well, so much for our jobs here in the States...http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=74&e=3&u=/cmp/20031101/tc_cmp/15800363[By: billybien / 2003-11-01]
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ARRRGABLE -Warrick
Well, that's just the kind of crap that upper management needs to see. Notice that they say it's risky but don't tell you how? I wish these people would either listen to calls internal techs take or buy a product where they already have to call an outsourcer for support! Either that, or there needs to be more public education about what happens when our jobs get outsourced overseas: we get screwed out of jobs, they get screwed out of support...Doesn't matter if you got your new computer for $600 if you can't get it fixed when it breaks down! -ladysethos
bull shit! IS IT WORTHWILE TO SHELL OUT A GRAND EVERY YEAR FOR A COMPUTER?????? -samurai
And they wonder why some people walk into their workplace with an uzi and start spraying the place with bullets. <shakes head and walks off> -RiffRaff
The main problem with outsourcing is that the decisions are often taken by the board of directors, however directors are normally only around for 3 - 5 years so when the shit hits the fan about lack of training/support/general staff unhappiness they're long gone with their golden handshake. Not every position can be outsourced and eventually their will be a mammoth workload on the 1 or 2 people left roaming large sites. Corporate EU's aren't going to be prepared to wait a few days whilst say computacentre (name pulled at random) find a contractor to throw at a site becuase of a help desk ticket from India just to swap a NIC or explain to them that 'yes that's normal' because their scripts can't cope. -fearmyroot
NAFTA baby, NAFTA -CyberGrandma
its all about the almighty $$$ - the rioch get richer and the working poor are outsurced... -Harm
TWA airlines does a kind of outsourcing too. They however use prison labour (levensworth) to book flights for customers. Quite nice to have murderers and rapists with all your personal info in front of them. -CyberGrandma
I have to say outsourcing isn't ALWAYS bad. I work for an outsourcer, supporting a fairly small company. Our 7 person team handles customer support better, both technically & personally, than the in-house techs we replaced did.
That said, offshore outsourcing sucks. It's so much harder to keep everyone in the loop. Our success is highly due to the fact that a company rep works closely w/ our support team. -Nonamys
"I've said it before, and I'll say it again...Democracy just doesn't work." <kent brockman> -billybien
*arming LART systems, donnining cammys*
well, off to do some corporate head hunting... you guys take care of crashing the outsouce servers.. *EGX2* -HappyCrappy
hmmm done and done..... * primes an emp specificaly designed for job security* -Harm
Sorry to tell you this, CyberGrandma, but here in Mexico we're being busted too. Our already low-pay jobs are going to India or somewhere like that. -Vulture
I would run for president with this motto as my platform but I'm affraid there only a handful of techs who would know what i was talking about and about 200 million (l)users who wouldn't care less unless I slept with an intern. -suprtechy26
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10.
That's outside of demarc...
Customer calls in just before the local dispatch office closes. She tells me that her dog went missing after her HSI install, and she was wondering if the dog had jumped in the tech's van before he left. She apparently really likes to ride in the car. So one of our team leads calls dispatch, who contacts the tech, who verifies that there is no dog in his van. I feel bad for these folks, though. I called back to let them know, they still hadn't found the dog, and it was snowing...poor thing. Still kind of took me by surprise as a reason to call tech support...[By: dreaming78 / 2003-11-01]
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Lokks like some is in for a "wuff" night <ducks pun LART> -lineswine
Dogs like to climb. Did she check the "roof!"? -billybien
Dogs like to climb? What? (blinks) -Warrick
on mushrooms -billybien
In a similar, sort of, story, a field tech apparently left this elderly lady's gate open and her dog got out, it was then hit by a car. Poor lady, but I mean she knew the tech was coming, she should have put him up or tied him up at least. -DemonicAngel
In a similar, sort of, story, a field tech apparently left this elderly lady's gate open and her dog got out, it was then hit by a car. Poor lady, but I mean she knew the tech was coming, she should have put him up or tied him up at least. -DemonicAngel
Second verse.. same as the first -suprtechy26
A little bit faster and a whole lot worse! -PaseoGuy
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11.
All Hope Abandon, Ye Who Surf Here
So I finally bit the bullet and decided to do away with my ISDN line and install DSL in a couple of weeks after I've moved in with Magenta. This means getting in bed with Service Blows Chunks, but as my sysadmin pointed out, they were still going to be getting my money with my ISDN; now they're just getting less of it. I even get a free DSL modem with wireless capability (if I want to enable that function). God only knows how they're making any money.
Any words of advice/warning/wisdom from those of you with DSL experience? Any words of sympathy/compassion/consolation from those of you with SBC experience?
[By: RiffRaff / 2003-11-02]
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WooHoo! First Post again! And from Magenta's Macintosh, too. Oh, the horror... the horror... -RiffRaff
Actually, Riff, I'm generally happy with my DSL providers -- I'm using one for home, three for work, and the home one overlaps one of the work ones. Of course, the DSLAM racks all belong to the phone company, whose service blows even more chunks (Telus is now in deep trouble with the regulators for failure to respond in a timely fashion to service outages)... but so long as they keep working, and they pretty well have, things are lovely. -chazz
Actually I'm pretty happy with SBC. The first 3 months nothing worked but for 3 years we.ve been pretty problem free (knocks on wood). Then again I think it may have to do with that the localtel folks set it up right before they were bought. -nm
I use Sprint (Local provider here) and I'm generally happy. I hate the fact the I have to pay $14/mo for an ISP when all I really need is the actual internet connection. (I host my own email and website.) They also refuse to reverse-up my IP address even though I pay for a static IP address. (My Ip reverses up to something like sw1235ttr-sprint.sprintlink.sprint.com!) I have something like 6 email addresses through Earthlink (required ISP), but I haven't use any for the year that I've had it. And, of course, the final indignity for me is that I have to buy phone service to get it. I do everything over my cell phone and don't even have a phone hooked up to my land line. -scooby111
Riff- I used to do tech support for SBC DSL, the service is actually pretty good, the Support sucks though. Should you ever need to call support don't blame the shitty support on the techs. SBC has lots of stupid rules, and they change them every other day. It is truly a tech's worst nightmare. -WickedClown
DO NOT USE THE SBC YAHOO DSL CD THEY SEND YOU!!!!!!!!!! They use PPPoE, and you don't need their CD for that. It just hijacks your entire Internet experience. If you're using a router, it can probably handle setting up PPPoE. Other than that, RiffRaff, I have it installed here in CT. through a subsidiary (SNET). It works pretty well, although I had a hard time getting connected at first. AND, just recently, it went out on a Friday. TS was good, but no luck. They sent out a field tech, letting me know if the prob was inside I'd be paying (fair, stupidity SHOULD BE painful), and he couldn't even get a signal where the line connected to the house. As it turned out, they turned off my circuit rather than someone else's who was discontinuing service. When it was turned back up, I was fine. The FT was scheduled to arrive anytime from 12-4 pm EDT, and I'm lucky my boss allowed me to take the afternoon off. Tech was there by 12:45 and done by 1:30. -CTYankee
Using cable here, sorry Riff mon.
-Warrick
I went with DSL because it was cheaper than "meep meep" cable modem service (think of wile-e-coyote's dinner). It's not as fast, but I can afford it and it beats the hell outta dial up. -billybien
I've had Vz DSL since April 2002. I'm generally happy with them, as I use my own Infinilink I500 modem, as opposed to the Westel they gave me. Once in a while I need to go into the Router and refresh the IP, but otherwise, I'm happy. IMO, DSL is your best bet when in an urban area, you have a dedicated line instead of having 50 people sharing one cable connection. -FistLaw
Hehehehe.... Billy, I love that Supersonic poultry, I have their equivalant where I am, and it ain't bad. :) -Warrick
I do tech support for them... they have sooooo many rules.. I can virtually end any call in 10 questions on windoze, and in 3 mins on macs (reboot covers 98.9 percent of mac stuff, outside of actual service outage) good luck, you are now hellbound... *LOL* -HappyCrappy
First comment from me while using my other half's macintosh...I hate this thing, all the keys are in the wrong farking place and there is only one mouse button! -CommanderData
I worked for service blows chunks. If it works, it's great. If you have problems, it's YOUR FAULT. Hope you have good luck! :) -computerdoc
well, is it too late to switch back to dialup ? LOL -water
Kinda curious about the modem, myself - know what brand/model, specifically? Lucky me, I work for the local provider, so get mind free... 1.5/320, static IP (and yes, I got 'em to change the reverse :) and email/web/etc... ahhhhh... -namor
NO!!! Dont get the 2Wire, trust me!!! -firebird2k2
NO!!! Dont get the 2Wire, trust me!!! -firebird2k2
I have my DSL provided by the company I work for... because I need it for when I'm on call. I had in fact chosen to have it in anyway, three years before. I'm also putting my father onto it when I move his computer back to his house in about a week and a half. Only problem is, the underlying telco is a bit crap sometimes. Mind you, as long as dad doesn't burn everything this time, we should be OK. -EmleyMoor
I've had Verizon DSL (128/756) since 2000 and I honestly can't complain. They screwed up the install (I installed the supplied Fujitsu modem and inside wiring) and it took them a couple of weeks to figure out that they had not flipped all of the proper bits /switches but they did credit me the outage. It's a dynamic IP (one day I will spring for static) but use no-ip to connect to home. Have it networked to all of my computers. It's been good so far. Don't ever want to go back to dial-up. (And yeah, the beep-beep users in my area are experiencing slow downs as more people sign up for the cable-broadband service). -ecoli
SBC-DSL is wonderful, just hope you don't have to deal with the local SBC - ours refused to fix a bridge-tap on the line, so we (eventually) had all our money refunded -madonnac
The 2wire works just fine, despite Firebird's warnings. The only problems people encounter is screwed up PCs with already bad software installed. Somehow, I dont think you are a candidate. Just open 172.16.0.1/setup, it will do the rest. Remembering where you live, you will most likely be on an RT, which should get you fast service. Just remember, the current dynamic 1.5-6.0/384 circuit is currently 99.99 per month. -psxdefector1
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12.
Current status, a quick story:
Right now, aside from the fact I'm at work, I'm semi- happy, as I've got me a new and fun game to play for a while. Call of Duty, good stress buster :) Anyone looking for me online for Multiplayer action, my nick is the same as here. As for my story, well this past Wednesday I took a two and a half hour long call thanks to one of our stupid field techs, and an even more aggravating Browser bar which installed itself.. get this fun, afer the tech left the customer, the last thing under the run command was regedit... our field techs generally aren't SUPPOSED to regedit a customer's system... anyone here have access to a Stratofortress or a large scale Theatre operations bomber?[By: Warrick / 2003-11-02]
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yeah i just uh, borrowed that game and lemme tell yaz! it is like a non buggy beutifull version of medal of honour. loving it so far. And i hated allied assult, something about the computer being able to shoot thru walls got me pissed off at it. -putahtek
yeah i just uh, borrowed that game and lemme tell yaz! it is like a non buggy beutifull version of medal of honour. loving it so far. And i hated allied assult, something about the computer being able to shoot thru walls got me pissed off at it. -putahtek
sorry boot teh double -putahtek
I've been playing one of the demos. It reminds me of MOHAA with some features of Day-Of-Defeat and America's Army. Not available in-store down-under, but I'm waiting for it. But, I've still got "Spearhead" & "Breakthrough" to keep me happy in the meantime. -Wraith556
CoD kicks ass! But, it needs more maps! -Snakeeye
Sounds like a game I should try... meanwhile, I'll keep playing Wolfenstein: Enemy Territory (100% free! woo!) -Wiser
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13.
A home for starfish?
Believe it or not, I actually saw someone who lived on Starfish drive[By: Bunglehawk069 / 2003-11-02]
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You can say that again! :) -RedSwingline
There is Starfish island on GTA Vice City. I enjoy running over people in the game. Something about carjacking someone and running them over with thier own car just makes me smile inside. -Sovern
LOL yea i am tryign to get to that island too so I can kick some starfish ass... maybe I can use the chainsaw on some of them :P -rockytech
"...exept starfish island where the crabs live..." /Wildstyle -maidtina
i just ran people down in starfish island... -jas75249
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14.
Ummm right
Just got off this call, wasn't sure what to think. customer said their internet doesn't work, and the cable light on the modem was out. I wanted to unplug the modem from power and she said she couldn't, they had a fire and all the wires were burnt and melted.[By: Raccoon / 2003-11-02]
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Does the lady live in/near SD? -ThreeBucks
No it was Texas actually, I know there's fires around SD and LA etc. -Raccoon
Oh man. I would have told her exactly what was on my mind. -firebird2k2
hmmm cable line melted... i would call that a problem - THE problem
most people woudl call me and state first off - "we had a fire the cable lines are melted- we take this to be a self evedent truth that we are SOL" -Harm
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15.
Offsite Link
http://www.tofslie.com/clientquotes.htm?fark
Hope you guys enjoy (SFW)[By: Bunglehawk069 / 2003-11-02]
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Good stuff. -firebird2k2
Awesome! I like "I need more pesshht peesshht chuttt chutt papapapa on this animation" the best. -ShutUpAndHangUp
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16.
Moron
Guy calls up, switched from PC to Laptop, okay I cleared out the modem, he's repairing. I go "Which lights are on the modem" he goes "all 3 and the bottom is blinking" ME to myself: that's not the same modem we have here on file. ME: Can you read me the lights. EU: Power, send, receive and activity. So there's no online light on EU: Ya that's right. ME: So what modem do you have(I was thinking I was looking at the wrong one) He goes "Motorola" and ther'es 3 lights like you said" NO theres, Power, Send, Receive, Online and activity as I said. ME: NO YOU DIDN'T You said 3 lights at the top and one blinking. Then I ask him if he has a firewall. EU: no I don't. ME: Not even the XP one? EU: ya I have that one on. ME: so you do have a firewall. God I can't wait for this farktwit to get a wireless router(which he said he was gonna get)[By: Bunglehawk069 / 2003-11-02]
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Sounds like break time after that call. -firebird2k2
Vee Vill now enstate the negative re-enforcment tool vif you sir.. everytime you BS me i vill send 300amps down the line.. starting NOW!!!! *zap* -Harm
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17.
KaZaA Doesn't put spyware on. . .
Well, some people my remember my 1st ever post about my (l)user Father and the RPC call, we, he's back, and fooking me off again! A few weeks ago, I managed to persuade him to let me scan his computer for Adware, he let me, and the scanner nearly crashed. After forcibly removing KaZaA, and it's some of it's Spyware, I re-ran the scan, and managed to get it clean. After I was finished, I forced into his tiny mind that All of KaZaA was bad, and he promised never to install it again. Last Night after finishing a difficult day. WHAT DO I FIND? KaZaA plus (The Pay version) on the machine. After nearly breaking the door i was opening, i forced him off the machine. All the time he is telling me that it is ad-free, until I manage to open Adaware, and scan the computer, same spy stuff. I am sure that I am not from the same gene-pool cus he is a real starfishy. If only I can confiscate (l)users computers if they say crap to me like that, I'd dell them back to them, earn a load of money, and probably confiscate it back. . . [By: Lynxphoenix / 2003-11-03]
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What about K-lite? If he INSISTS on having Kazaa, I mean. -Dr Jerkyl
LOL - I'd Dell them back to them. Typo or Fruedian slip? -Hellion
As the good Dr. pointed out K-Lite is probably the best thing if he will not live witout his daily doesage of (C) violation ;) I'm not 100% sure it's spyware free but it can't be as riddled with it as the 'real' versions are. -fearmyroot
(thud) General rule with me and my computer for the parents. Look on the internet, fine. If you need to send an email through my account, OK (usually they'll tell me for these two things when they do it, they use it so seldom).
Anything more than restarting the computer, tell me and if I give you instructions, they will carry them out carefully. If I say stay off the computer, they will.
-Warrick
Kazaa lite is still just as bad. The only difference is the EULA specifies that you agree to put third party ad driven features on your computer. -RePo
As far as I have been able to tell from my limited encounters with it.. K-Lite doesnt have any spyware in it at all. Anyone else trying Napster 2.0 or iTunes for Windows yet? I'm debating which one to sign up for. -firebird2k2
I have been using iTunes, and it seems to be a pretty slick piece of software. My only problem was that it tried to wipe my ipod the first time I hooked it up, as the auto-sync was turned on by default, and there wasn't any music in the itunes library yet. The library management and playlist creation portions of the software are great. -DreadPirate
I have Kazaa Lite on this PC. Am running Spybot-Search & Destroy (adware killing program) right this second.... Found a couple cookies, fixed. No adware. YMMV. -EvilOtto
K-lite is fine. I run it at home, but it's still crap. It just happens to stink a little less than the others. I just wish I could get them to stop the port-hopping madness. -scooby111
I-Tunes & Napster not good - can't use the feckers in Europe.
-RTFM
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18.
Not really a story: Internet licences
My father came up with the idea that people should have to have a licence to access the Internet... in much the same way as you need one for watching television in the UK. I think it's a slightly mad idea... but only slightly. He says the ISPs could be taxed and pass it on to their customers. He is only concerned with the money-raising aspect of it. I would like it to be the case that we could endorse licences for certain stupid offences, and ban people from using the Internet for either gross offences or accumulating 12 unexpired points. It would be virtually impossible to administrate, but could this be an answer to the starfish problem?[By: EmleyMoor / 2003-11-03]
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Why not? Here in Europe we have the ECDL (European Computer Driving License) http://www.ecdl.ie which, hopefully, will make that some problems handled by TC will dissapear. -Dr Jerkyl
As much as we joke about this, think of the potential consequences: The US government would be legislating the Internet. This means a federal license, with all the paperwork and red tape involved with that process. Then, a new federal agency would have to be created to enforce those licenses. Said agency would have to have law enforcement capabilities in order to deal with people surfing the net without a license, or on a suspended license. Do we really want another federal law enforcement agency breaking down citizens' doors at 3am, bursting in with guns drawn, and handcuffing the entire family for unauthorized Internet use? Too much government interference for an old Libertarian like me. -RiffRaff
We now have people who are too old / blind / stoopid driving with valid / invalid / expired / no licenses. Your proposal would only allow the government to interfere with the process. And we all know what happens when they get their hands into it. After all, some of the worst starfish are in government positions. Just look at the DMCA! How about manditory computer classes. If they don't attend they get their computers confiscated! -ecoli
The other problem with licensing the useage of the internet is the fact that most licenses are local only to the host country the same as many qualification/certificates. The `net is global so you'd need major world powers to agree upon something and start force feeding it to people as a good thing. You can't get these doofuses in power to agree on anything when it's to do with their local country let alone none voting/tax paying spods in distant lands. Whilst I'd love to see some form of enforced basic training on computers I know it's never going to happen, I mean ultimatley the reason you have to pass a driving test is because if you smack someone with a car at speed they're dead, deceased, an ex person, despite all the people screaming about how DDoS's and viri affect the economy noone dies as it's not dangerous. Until such time that not knowing how to run a home PC can cause loss of life we're all just pissing in the wind with respect to licenses.. -fearmyroot
Good points all... I think it's great that I can come to TSC and let off some steam and have a few laughs. However, I really prefer the starfish just the way they are. If anything, I want them to get dumber! Another sad part of outsourcing, and sending support jobs overseas, is that it forces the (L)users to develop some computer skills whether they want to or not. The more computer literate they are, means that less support is needed, resulting in less jobs in my chosen field. This is besides the fact that anything that encroaches on my civil liberties, (what's left of them), is immediately suspect. -Hellion
As much as I hate starfishy's, my voice of reason says this would be terrible idea. Anything done by the government or regulated as such goes to heck. Now a license to breed..well thats another thing entirely -suprtechy26
Smaller solutions are always better. Modify the TOS for $ISP to say "Management retains the right to cancel account at any time without notice or refund in the event of excessive resource utilization". Then define excessive resource utilization to mean "if you're a neeping farkwit who calls tech support with problems that any chimpanzee should be able to solve, we cancel your account and keep your money." -EvilOtto
Sure, why not. If they made it a true test of the ability to operate a computer and update it etc, then we'd solve the outsourcing problem pretty quickly. There wouldn't be any jobs to outsource. Not to mention that the computer industry would grind to a halt in this country. Oops! No more high-level computer jobs either. That means that we also get to solve the problem of the US being an economic power. The easy fix for that is, of course, dumb down the test so that any chimp can pass it like we did with the drivers test. Then all we've accomplished is introduced a new tax and a new federal agency to soak up our money. I'm all for it. I'm hoping that someday soon, the feds can tell me which shirt to wear in the morning. It's getting too difficult anyway. -scooby111
waitaminute... You need a license to watch tv in the UK ?!?! -Spyder19
Yes. Under the Wireless Telegraphy Act of 1949 (as amended), "You need a TV Licence to install or use any equipment to receive television programme services - for example a television set, video recorder, set-top box, PC with a broadcast card or any other TV receiving equipment." - and a licence covers "any person working at or visiting the premises, installation/use in (a) a vehicle, boat or caravan used for touring from place to place (b) any other caravan provided that television is not being used at the licensed premises at the same time by the licence holder and any person visiting them, and also use by the licence holder of a television receiver anywhere, providing it is powered only by internal batteries.". Licences do not cover "any parts of your premises exclusively occupied by others...", "use of TV in a non-touring caravan at the same time as at the licensed premises" or "colour installation or use where the licence is only for black and white"... which is much cheaper than for colour. The fee for a colour licence for 1 year is currently £116. -EmleyMoor
And a TV license in Ireland as well... €150 a year. And unlike the Brits, all our TV channels get ads in the middle of the program (in the UK BBC1 and BBC2 have all programs unbroken by stupid ads). Quite frankly, in Ireland it IS a ripoff. I watch the British channels only and I'm paying for a TV full of ads which I do not watch. -HunterSThompson
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19.
Not entirely tech
News came in today that they are putting new speed cameras on the M4 (a big motorway/freeway that runs past here to London) that work by photographing car registration plates between 2 cameras at a set distance and thereby working out your average speed. It will issue a ticket if your average speed exceeds 78mph. The thing is, since it is a passive system, no radar or laser detectors will work.
One of my co-workers read this and said 'What's the bet that the manufacturers of these radar detectors get a shedload of calls to their technical help departments in a month or so's time from loads of people who've got speeding fines?' And then added 'And what's the bet most of them'll be AOL users too?' [By: CommanderData / 2003-11-03]
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I think there is a case waiting to be heard about the new forward looking GATSO units that take a shot of the driver+passengers faces along with the plate. Apparerently some bloke got zapped with his mistress and the wife saw the pic. Seems that they and a lot of people are arguing it's an invasion of privacy. -fearmyroot
The forward facing bastards dont flash when they take your pic either. I almost got got by one in the 40 mph short lead up to a 70mph area. When i saw it i was doing 43mph so i'm hoping i got under 40 before it went. Hopefully being an IR video camera feeding into a central office it wont suffer from the notorious calibration errors of its counterparts that snap you if you only do one or two mph faster than the limit instead of 10% + 2 of the speed limit that they are required to have in this area -maidtina
Around here, they are talking about having a unmaned van or trailer with photo rader in it. So if you get tagged going above the speed limet, they send a photo of you car, and a ticket. They want it portable so people don't get used to it in on spot. Only good thing is that it won't add points on your drivers license. -nascar
Wll here up in the north they're having a problem, as people tend to know where the cameras are. They simply cover the number plate in front, put on a Micky Mouse or a Reagan caricature mask and drive by at high speeds... Other popular drive-by:s are with a motorbike on one wheel :D -Dr Jerkyl
Apparently one major problem with the static cameras is glass etching acid, if it's a video the operator sees a hand, a splash of liquid and then nothing but a blur. Obviously photo ones see nowt. Then you have drive-by paintballing, filling the mechanism with that polyfilla spray stuff (apparently it conducts nicely ZAP!) One enterprising bikey started spraying them pink a while back and of course you've got as the good Dr. said bikies on one wheel, dodgey plates that look fuzzy on film... personally I think the cameras are more dangerous than the speeding personally, I mean you see nutters jaming on the anchors to get under the limit and piling on the power as the pass by, it you tell me they're in control of the machine at that point I'll be asking you to share what ya smoking. -fearmyroot
Here in Virginia there is a lot of discussion about improving I-81. Among other things, there is a plan to make it a toll road using EZPass transponders to pay the tolls. There is some possibilty that they will use EZPass to detect your speed, or simply calculate your time on and off the highway. -LaserGuru
We're got photo-radar intersections here - got most of 'em memorized, now. And mobile units - fun stuff. Haven't seen much vandalizing of the units, though. -namor
Around here they have a photo radar unit that sits in a box the size of a 2-drawer filing cabinet and can be remotely controlled from a car up to 500 ft away. (How they think people will figure a filing cabinet is any less out of place on the side of a road than anything else is beyond me.) Actually, now that I talk about it, I remember that they were told by the province to stop using it because there were questionable legalities. Now they have to actually pull people over again and hand them the ticket directly. :) -Jay911
Here the mobile speed camera unit is based in a transit van with the speed camera logo on the back, they have already been in trouble for parking it on the pavement behind a bush, forcing pedestrians into the roadway, to try and hide it. The local radio station now sends shoutouts to "The Hampshire Photographic Society parked in (roadname, city)" and play them a song, the station even got the unit calling them up asking for songs at one point... -maidtina
A town here has one of those radar things on a trailer with big read outs on it to tell motorists their speed. No ticketing but a good reminder. They often park it in school zones and such. Much more civilized and imho much more effective. And no questions if it is legal or not. -Wolffarmer
That reminds me- I need to get a new tinfoil hat to ward off the bad radar waves. -LaserGuru
Orwell was 25 years early. -scooby111
I LOVE those trailers that show you how fast your going here in the states. Find one in the middle of the night, pace out a 1/4 mile and let it rip. I ran past one late one night and spent almost an hour running back and forth seeing how fast I could get it to register...122MPH when I finally got bored with it :-) -Crashville
I've got a few good ones from the land of Oz. There's a fixed speed camera about 50 metres up the road where I live. It has slowed most traffic, but after a big local event, it flashes like a disco strobe light. It is claimed by our "People's Commissars for Road Safety" the Roads and Traffic Authority (often known as the department of We Believe Our Own Propaganda) that speed cameras would only be placed in known accident black spots. They why were they built into the M5 east tunnels, BEFORE the road opened! No wonder that speed cameras are known locally as "CASH REGISTERS" and in total have the same effect on road safety. Proudly sponsored by the Office Of State Revenue. -Wraith556
They had speed vans here in BC for a while; the new government got elected in part on the platform of pulling them off the road, which they have. The spiel when they were initially set up is, "We don't intend these to make money; they are present simply to convince people to slow down." Then the government got their knickers in a twist because they never made back their purchase price, people were in fact slowing down... whenever they saw a van parked at the side of the road... -chazz
Crashville: is that where you got your nick? ;) -PaseoGuy
Speaking of the Trailers here in the States: There was one in my residential neighborhood set up for 25MPH. I grabbed my bike and ramp, and passed the thing, in mid air, at 32 MPH. I'm sure the cops enjoyed that picture. -Bobsentme
For fun try standing on a busy corner and aim a hair dryer at the oncoming cars! -atomicbill
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20.
There's something wrong with YOUR server
Of course there is. And you are able to determine this because you own an eMachine and don't even know what operating system you are using. Then I tell you to right click on My Computer and tell me what it says next to "System." And you swear you're searching everywhere and you can't find it. And then I ask you to tell me EVERYTHING it says on that window, and you say "System: Windows XP Home, SP I." Perhaps your inability to stay connected to the internet is due to the fact that you haven't updated windows or your virus definitions in like... ever. Dunno. maybe, ya think?? heck no. of COURSE our "sevrer" is down. Sometimes i mess with them and ask "which server" when i know darned well they're having trouble connecting to the network via lan or dialup. [By: battybeyond / 2003-11-03]
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Sic Robin on 'em :) -Hellion
But it can't be my system, I haven't changed ANYTHING!! (in about a year) -scooby111
I used to love it when the fish would say "Your server is down".. because my immediate reply would be "Which server would that be?". Puts the fish in their place and reminds them who the smart one is. -EvilOtto
I've started asking which server, as well... then when they ask, "What do you mean," I respond by listing all of the various kinds we can have at various points on our network until their brains explode... HTTP, FTP, POP, IMAP, SSH, telnet, SMTP, NTP.... <kaboom> -namor
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