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Tech Stories Archives - November 2008
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1.
Back into the fire...
At Casa de Chaos, we had changed over to an outside managed system for our guest's internet access. At that time, I no longer had to support the old internet service connections for our guests, as the new service provided 24-hour phone support with a very short wait-time. Yippeee! It left me more time to take on the support of our old AS/400, Adv/36-based front office software system grumble... Then we replaced our entire front office and point-of-sale systems with the "latest and greatest", and I didn't have to look at that Adv/36 again! Yippeee! Now, I find out today that a contract dispute has erupted, and the internet service provider for our guest's services has dropped us like a hot potato. Our old provider is now back in the mix as the one who is willing to bend over backward to meet our needs as a customer. Yippeee-grumble- see the following. The primary support person, having to help the cranially-deceased in trying to connect to the Internet was, then wasn't, and now, was again... ...me... ...fudge...[By:  Voz
/ 2008-11-01 ]
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"Fuck! And...DOUBLE FUCK!!" -vacuumtubes
Ah balls! -starfishmagnet
Murphy's a bitch, bastard, prick, jerk, arsehole, f*cknugget, <insert favorite derogatory/disparaging title here>, etc... -unrenowned
Sometimes, job security just fsckin' blows doesn't it? -RA
De Ja Pew - The sense that you've smelled this shit before. -Stryker One
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2.
What to make of this, nt/ot
You know you have been on tsc/watching the Sopranos too much when you read http://hardware.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/11/02/0156201 this title and think of something completely different [By: starfishmagnet / 2008-11-02]
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Or when you get visions of John Cleese behind a desk after reading: "something completely different" -unrenowned
Steve McCroskey: Johnny, what can you make out of this?
[Hands him the weather briefing]
Johnny: This? Why, I can make a hat or a brooch or a pterodactyl... </Obligatory Airplane! quote -lineswine
Or playing too much Star Wars: KOTOR when you begin wondering how many darkside points each fish is worth... -LazyLemming
Are you sure they are not light side points? -raneshem
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3.
Drinking Game for Tomorow.
If you're one of the many people watching the election results roll in with dread and horror, make a little better with this great drinking game! Everytime a state turns red, drink a beer. Everytime a state turns blue, take a shot. If a state turns green, stop drinking and call 911, you've probably got alcohol poisoning. But lets face it, we're all going to need to be drunk for the next 4 years.[By: LazyLemming / 2008-11-03]
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What's my color? Magenta? *bfeg* -RiffRaff
I've been drunk for the past 8 years, so nothing can hurt me now! -billybien
I'm in! -TechnoTherapist
Color me sorry I gave up drinking 17 years ago. Guess I'll have to live with it. -atomicbill
I've got something that's sixty percent grain alcohol. thud -AdmiralLaurie
My alternative - State turns blue, drink a coke. State turns red, eat a bean burrito. Keep the bathroom locked so I can't get in. If Obama wins, I'll need to change. If McCain wins, I'll be full of noxious gasses. Just like the campaigns! -linuxmatt
See an Alien, drink a glass of Mojo. Uhhh, my head... -MadJack
*glad he's canadian* -Icelator
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4.
NT/OT: A car that runs on politicians!
http://finance.yahoo.com/family-home/article/106040/Air-Cars:-A-New-Wind-for-America's-Roads / From the article : An air-powered car? It may be available sooner than you think at a price tag that will hardly be a budget buster. The vehicle may not run like a speed racer on back road highways, but developer Zero Pollution Motors is betting consumers will be willing to fork over $20,000 for a vehicle that can motor around all day on nothing but air and a splash of salad oil, alcohol or possibly a pint of gasoline[By: Necros / 2008-11-03]
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Car running on politicians: How small do you have to grind them up? -CorpCowboy
did'nt they try something like this before. I think they called it a hot-air baloon? cause you know hot air...politicians? I thought it was funny :) -neuman1812
I gotta FART!! -vacuumtubes
That would be really cool, if it didn't look like a pencil sharpener. -Seamus
Bah. There are much better alternatives, that run with kinetic power. Fuel economy is unbeatable, and don't need any type of inorganic fuels. They are pretty strongly built, and even some are actually made in the USA. An example here: http://www.littletikes.com/toys/cozy-coupe-ii-car.aspx?Ne=1&N=26+140 -TheGhost
I just spit my effin mouthful of candy out from laughing so hard at The Ghosts link. Funny little apparition isn't he? -RA
The irony of the article I found is the sheer number of factories they will build. I thought that they were trying to reduce the carbon footprint. According to the article "There will be plants in nearly every state, based on the number of drivers in the state. California will have as many as 17 air car manufacturing plants, and there'll be around 12 in Florida, eight in New York, four in Georgia, while two in Connecticut will serve that state and Rhode Island." -raneshem
Second they may have to change the company name from Tata. <insert obligatory Burkiss comment here> -raneshem
Question one: How do we capture and bottle all that hot air? (Well, at least we know there won't be a fuel shortage for it VHVEG...) -MadJack
Thinking of Sarah Palin's kids Trig and Track gave me this flashback to my childhood: http://www.samstoybox.com/toys/TrikTrak.html -concept14
Why do all of these alternative cars look so stupid. -Icelator
Or why do they look like they belong in a 1970s sci-fi show (movie or tv) with the year 2000 in the future. Or, are just hopelessly impractical. -Wraith556
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5.
Election Day (NT/OT)
Just a reminder to my fellow Americans to get out and vote tomorrow. I don't care who you vote for; just vote. Exercise a right that a lot of people have shed sweat, blood, tears, and lives to defend; a right that not everyone in the world enjoys.
Remember:
1: If you don't vote, you can't complain
2: If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem
Yes, I know those are trite cliches, but you get the idea.
That's all. We now return you to your regularly scheduled Tech Support Comedy stories. Thank you.
[By: RiffRaff / 2008-11-03]
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I'm voting for you. -burrkiss
Thank christ it will be over soon! -starfishmagnet
Join the Mobile Infantry and save the Galaxy. Service guarantees citizenship -NoneProvided
Win or lose, at least on Wednesday I can celebrate the (sadly temporary) end of political ads...now if only we could get some of those medical ads off the air, TV might be worth watching again. -SillyGirl
If you're not in a swing state, be very glad. We're getting 6 or 8 robocalls every evening, plus people at the door and endless streams of pamphlets. -Fuji
Fingers crossed for you guys in the US. I know which one I want to get in... -CommanderData
Can't vote (not in US), but no matter who wins it'll be an improvement. -Evan
I look at it: If you don't vote then STFU about the government. My wife and I always vote and for the last few years we've done mail in ballots. I was listening to the radio and some places let you vote early...starting in October if you just to to the courthouse with ID. I found out work allows 2 hours either before or after your shift to vote tomorrow. Since I start at 7am I'm putting in to leave at 2pm to vote. -Starfury
American, please remember this; who you vote for hasd wider implications than your own borders...specifically the ones that get crossed during yet another invasion - comprende? -lineswine
E "LEC" tion day? I thought it was eRECtion day! ... uh oh... I shouldn't have taken those 10 viagra pills... -TheGhost
<George>Alot of people say that if you don't vote, you have no right to complain. Bullshit. I say that if you vote, and elect some corrupt person, and they get into office and fuck things up even more. Then you have no right to complain because you got what you wanted. I, however, who did not vote, who did not even leave the house on election day, have every right to complain about the mess that you created , and that I had nothing to do with</George> -Spyder19
A vote for Nobama means take half your cash, give it to a lowlife who wont fucking work. I believe in a hand up, not a god damn hand OUT. -randyskier
Sorry, I should have stated in the OP that this is a *non-partisan* post, intended to get people out to vote, not put down the candidate of their choice. Keep the flamebait out of my post, and put it in the Break Room where it belongs, please. -RiffRaff
Sorry RiffRaff. If they can't be arsed to remember the election day, I don't want them voting. The problem we've had in the US is too many ignorant people voting on a single issue on what they hear on a commercial. 'Get out the vote' campaigns make things worse, not better. -scooby111
Scoob, on the surface, yes, telling someone to go pull a random lever is no different than sending in a first-grader to vote. But I think most people are capable of knowing what single issue is most important to them, and voting accordingly. If I ask someone why they didn't vote, and they respond "I didn't feel educated enough on the issues," I'd give them credit for being honest and acknowledge that they probably did the right thing. What I hate is the "My vote doesn't make a difference" bullshit, which I think the "Get out and vote" campaigns can help overcome. Just MHO; your mileage may vary. :~} -RiffRaff
I'm afraid of Americans. And I am one. -Seamus
The "My vote does not matter" or at least the "My vote doesn't matter as much as the person in Florida or Ohio" problem is real, brought about by our election system. Did you know that in 2004, 66% of all the money raised by both presidential candidates was spent in only 5 states? And 99% in a total of 16 states. But it can be fixed, and even without an amendment to the constitution. http://www.nationalpopularvote.com/ -SirJosh
I agree that it seems like only a handful of states vote for the president and the rest of us don't count. It may not be true (or heck, it might really be true) but I know that's definitely what it feels like (especially come election day) -SillyGirl
TinyTribble (1st Grade) voted on the computers at school in a mock election... she voted Libertarian! (*SNIFF!*) Brings a tear to my eye. You know? -ShujinTribble
My three all voted Libertarian in their school's mock elections too....there is hope for the future....or at least kids who start to think more on their own, rather than what's needed to pass a test... -FormerSithLord
I'm in the UK - So my virtual vote is for RiffRaff.... -Wonko The Sane
Make your MP (Member of Parliament) work - don't re-elect them... -Wonko The Sane
It does not matter who you vote for - the Government still gets in... -Wonko The Sane
I'm planning to vote. I was told point blank by someone that if I don't vote for either of the 2 popular ones, I'm throwing my vote away. *shrugs* I don't see it as such, though- at least I'm standing up and doing something about what I think, right? So... In addition to what's already been said, please also remember that there are _4_ other candidates running. They may not be the most popular, but even so, there are still choices. -taieena
Short get out the vote clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AbBq29qGxaA -Starfury
Dear all of those who don't vote but still complain, you were given a chance to speak up and choose who you want from the available choices and you decided not to, you've already made your decision so zip it. For those who complain about the person they voted for: you made a mistake it happens but remember this next time you vote and make a more informed decision. -Icelator
I look at voting this way. I am going to voter for who I think will do the best job. Currently I find no candidates worthy of the job, so I may not vote. I believe that by me not voting shows how strongly I believe in the system . I feel that even though we are encouraged to vote we do not have to. I further believe that I will not vote for someone I feel that i cannot trust. I am not nor have I ever been a sheep that will vote for A or B because that is all we hear about. I could do a write in but would it matter in the small picture yes I can complain and say I did not vote for the new president but I know in the larger picture I vote for me wil not change the way milliions of Americans will vote. I want what is right for America not the lesser of the few evils. </my two cents> -raneshem
sorry for the bad grammar and spelling on the previous comment. -raneshem
Riff, whose your VP candidate? Alfred E Neuman? -Wraith556
Wraith: Isn't RiffRaff partied up with Lewis Black? -unrenowned
John Stewart, although I'm not sure my staff has informed him of this yet. *eg* -RiffRaff
Riff - I think Magenta might be a little peeved of your "staff" were talking to anyone else. No? -ShujinTribble
I hve my jet fueled ready to escape to London if Nobama wins, wish me luck. -randyskier
So basically you're saying you'd rather have an uninformed vote than a blank? I'm able to vote in my own country (not USA), but I don't, because if I do it won't be based on a thorough investigation of which candidate would be the best choice for me. Also, why wouldn't I be able to complain? What about the people who realized Bush isn't all he's cracked up to be after voting for him? They lose their Complaint Points™ after voting for that guy? The optimal situation would be where everybody researches the candidates fully before casting the vote, but you have to realize that this isn't eligible at all. So what would you rather? A guy voting for a horrible candidate because he has a nice, soothing voice, or a guy not voting? Also: “whom you vote for,” not “who.” -Mikoangelo
randyskier - If you make enough money to have your own jet, I can understand you voting for McSame. But why are you bothering to post to TSC? -Divinar
When I went in to vote for President in 2004, I felt like I was choosing between the gas chamber and lethal injection. I said that to my wife once and she replied, "Sometimes I think it's intentional." You want to know what's depressing though? According to a commercial I saw, only 55.3% of registered voters actually voted in 2004. I could see if it was a non-Presidential year, but '04? That means 44.7% of registered to vote Americans woke up on Election Day '04, looked at the calendar, took a deep breath, and then said "Ah, f*ck it." -TheJman
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6.
F**king collage techies
I am a student at a collage (studying IT). The system is s**t, it only has IE and not Firefox (which i prefer) so i ran it off my memory stick. Now when i run it on the collage system it sometimes crashes so i use task manager to kill it (using Ctrl, Shift + Esc to access it). The techies say I've been hacking the system and giving myself privileges (even though anyone can do it). And now I'm banned from using ANY probable storage.[By: EvilDog / 2008-11-04]
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Can you say "transfer"? EJECT! -redevil34
Did you point out that they just proved that there users and should be fired? -Crai
Did you point out that they are idiots and deserve to have their teaching license revoked? -unrenowned
<Grammar & Spelling Nazi> It's collEge. CollAge is a visual image composed of other pictures. And what the frick is 'probable' storage? Maybe 'portable'? I see your frustration, but dammit, spelling is part of a collEge education, too! </Nazi> -CTYankee
To be fair, those college techies are doing their job! If Firefox isn't on their--it's because their starfishes bosses said it can't be on there. Calling you a hacker on the other hand... -Silphion
There are layers of fail there that I can't even fathom. -Seamus
Maybe you need the drive of improbability... -K9Insanity
Make that the Infinte Drive of Improbability. That'll teach me to post pre-coffee -K9Insanity
Annnddd I still got it wrong. I'm going back to bed. -K9Insanity
sorry abut the grammar errors
and some of the computers DO have FireFox but it doesn't work (and the settings are locked) and another thing is that the system also has s**t security its like a sieve -EvilDog
oh an another thing i got my tutor to try the Ctrl, Shift + Esc shortcuts on some of the student accounts and it worked (even though the techies said it wouldn't, when he told them of this they said they where too busy trying to get laptops banned to hear about "small security holes" -EvilDog
Yes, long and short of it is, the "techies" are actually starfish, and are in dire need of 9mm migraines. -Seamus
Well coming from a k-12 environ I can see their point of view. Although they do seem a little less bright. However, given that Firefox typically is harder to lock down or restrict(at least on a network/global level) I understand keeping firefox off. Even if they are poor techs it usually isn't the lower level techs who make the rules on security or what gets put on images. Sorry for starting to rant. I just know how it is when people/students try to go around security and how things get broken when they try and especially succeed. Just rem. they are doing the job we do as well, regardless if it makes sense. We don't want people cheating around our security. -MrJay67
Evildog, when you finish school and get a corporate IT job, you will learn the difference between authorized and unauthorized software. There are reasons for this and I'm sure you will learn the reasons why. -formatCdrive
You go to ITT right? Sounds like it. I went there and had the same problems. -neuman1812
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7.
It's 5:30 NT/OT
AMOn Erection Day The voting places don't even open for half an hour And the local news is covering the exit polls... I gotta tellya, these people are on top of their game[By: Spyder19 / 2008-11-04]
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Lucky you- our polls here in my town don't open till 8, so I have to vote after work. And wtf- covering the exit polls before they even open???? -taieena
These would be the same people that print news papers saying who won before the election begins. Or who have already said Obama is the winner with out a vote being cast. I hate the media. -Crai
some town in New Hampshire opened and then closed it's polls-obama won -postal tech
Erection Day?
Is that a date with a special someone?
Or is it just a mistype? -EvilDog
Um, no, I actually did that on purpose, kinda gives the proper meaning to the day, I mean, they hafta get it up so they can screw us... -Spyder19
oh, are you having an election over there? You've kept that quiet..... -Shaede
To be technical Crai, its more accurate to say 'without a single vote being COUNTED' as many votes have been casted in absentee ballots and advanced polls, they just aren't allowed to count them, or at least publish the results as it may sway future voters. Kinda like the smallest district seems to have (which they can do since its the actual day now). -evolvedstarfish
The Australian media has been so PRO-Obama, you wondered if there was another candidate, until they had a chance to paint the Republican nominees in any extremely negative light. -Wraith556
Early voting FTW. Lines are for suckers. -LazyLemming
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8.
Open My DNA part 1
Before I get into the story let me describe my job. I work in my school’s main computer lab, my job is to walk around wearing a red vest and help students work the computers as well as stock printers and refill staplers. My boss is a good guy, it works around my school schedule and it is actually rare to run into a rude person. However rare is not never, otherwise why would I be posting here?
Now I only actually work 4 hours a week 2 Thursday and 2 Monday. I don’t mind helping people when they ask nicely and no one is on shift as happens a lot.
Now that you have the background lets set the stage: Me,
Syzyx, and Brad (12 inches Brad from my previous
story) are sitting at a table in the lab (there are empty tables for laptops)
and talking. Over walks this girl
that Brad knows from class. She begins discussing an assignment with Brad which
included her playfully slapping brad a couple times. She turns to me and the
following conversation takes place.
Girl (never actually did learn her name): Do you still work here?
Me (Most wonderful person in the room): yes but I’m not on shift right now
(currently 9:30 I work 1-3).
Girl: Do you know how to use photoshop?
Me: yeah, what do you want to do?
Girl: *incoherent babble about a title page and how another person has a title
page without actually describing what she wants*
Me:*asking questions trying to understand*
[By: Icelator / 2008-11-04]
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9.
Open My DNA part 2
Me:*asking questions trying to understand*
(it is rapidly becoming clear she wants either an
hour long tutorial which I don’t have time to give or me to do the assignment
for her to her specifications which is not going to happen.)
Me (hearing her mention printing on a larger page size): for the paper size all
you have to do is make sure the printer is selected and then choose the paper
size.
Brad: yeah it’s not that hard to do.
Girl: but I don’t know how to use photoshop can you
show me?
Girl: Let me do something on your laptop. (note: not
a question, I guess she didn’t want cooties from Syzyx’s
mac)
Me (experiencing whiplash from the topic change):
what?
Girl: Let me do something on your laptop.
Me: what do you want to do on my laptop?
Girl: I just need to check something.
Me: what do you want to check?
Girl: I just need to check something.
Lather, rinse, repeat four times.
Me: what do you want to do on my laptop?
Girl: I need to open my dna.
(yes she said that, word for word)
Me: WHAT???? [By: Icelator / 2008-11-04]
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<quote>" Let me do something on your laptop.</quote> If she is cute, she can do anything she wants on my lap top. <BEFG> -TheGhost
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10.
Open My DNA part 3
Syzyx: *trying not to laugh has actually pulled his
touque down over his face*
At this point she has come around the table and is standing next to where I am
sitting. I forget the exact words but I basically find out she wants to open a
word document on her thumb drive and went back and forth from wanting to check
it and wanting to work on it.
Me: why can’t you just use the
school computers.
Girl: they’re too slow. (they really are)
Me: so you just want to correct a spelling mistake in the assignment?
Girl: yeah.
Me: *reaches for the thumb drive to put in my computer just so I can get rid of
her*
Girl: *yanks it out of my hand*
Me: *puts thumbdrive in my computer*
(basically she just wanted to check that she had saved her document correctly
and didn’t make any changes and
wanted to show her very poorly edited picture of Wayne
Gretsky’s head on a cartoon pig, it only took about thirty seconds why
shouldn’t couldn’t just tell me I’ll never know)
Girl’s friends show up and they go another room to work on the
photoshop thing (there are small meeting rooms off
of the computer lab that do have one computer in them each).
[By: Icelator / 2008-11-04]
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11.
Open My DNA part 4
Five minutes later she stands in the doorway of the room facing me with an
expectant look on her face. (I had previously commented that she could use
paint, word or even powerpoint
instead.)
Me: *explains again politely that she can use another program*
Girl: * keeps looking at me*
Me: you can ask steve
*points to the guy who just came on shift* for help if you need it.
Girl: No.
Me: Fine $20/hr minimum of 2 hours (note I have class in an hour)
Girl: I don’t want to have sex with you (yes she said that)
Me: press F1.
Brad: yeah that will actually open the help and you can search for what you
need.
Girl: *keeps looking at me*
Me: *finally tired of this crap* No. *goes back to what I was doing*
Girls: *sighs and storms off and doesn’t ask
steve at all* (lucky
steve)
Me to Brad and Syzyx: What the F*** was that?
Brad and Syzyx: general shrugging notions.
Later on I found out that she came back and complained about me to Brad.
[By: Icelator / 2008-11-04]
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12.
Open My DNA part 5
Later on while I was working I walk by her as she is using one of the school
computers.
Girl to friend: I don’t want to ask him for help he was rude to me earlier.
Me: you mean after you demanded to use my laptop, and then tried to get me to do
your homework for you, no you were the one being rude.
Girl: *denies and keeps complaining*
Me: if you have a specific question about a program I will help you but I will
not do your homework for you. *walks away*
From now on when I’m sitting in the computer lab I have a sign that says: due to
recent events my tech support is no longer free unless I’m on shift, exceptions
at my discretion.
I have no problem helping people like this other girl today who asked me how to
print on both sides, quick and easy done in thirty seconds and she asked nicely
and clearly but what the hell was with this girl? [By: Icelator / 2008-11-04]
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sorry didn't realize how long that was going to be. -Icelator
Any chance you could edit her DNA? Maybe but in a few brain cells for her? :) -Tekkie
*TINK!* -Seamus
So, a girls offer you to "open her DNA" on your lap top. And you didn't get what she meant. ... Ok son, it's time we have a little talk. Do you know about bees and flowers?... :P <flees to the LART shelter> -TheGhost
Open her DNA... so many possible comments. If she was cute, where are the pictures? -srteach
SRTeach -there's laws against sex with mentally incompetents. However, obviously they're not enforced, or we'd not have so many starfish. -ralphp1024
ralphp1024 what does the law say about TWO mental-incompetents mating with each other, because that's how we got THIS one! -udoshan
You know I this girl makes me miss the girl who just tried to steal my nametag and actually unpinned from my vest while I was wearing it. -Icelator
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13.
Free Starbucks! Free doughnuts!
Free tall coffee today at Starfusks and free Krispykremes at participating stores![By: billybien / 2008-11-04]
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Also free scoop of Ben and Jerry's ice cream between 5pm and 8pm. Bring your voting sticker or a pic of you at the voting booth. -silvermoon
Actually you don't need the "I voted" sticker. Turns out there's this pesky federal law making it a felony to offer an incentive to someone to vote, so they're all giving the coffe, donuts, etc. to anyone who asks. -Fuji
Reason's 'Hit & Run' blog has several entries regarding the "I Voted" freebies and their dubious legal status. (Fuji beat me to the punch.) The most interesting giveaway is http://www.reason.com/blog/show/129860.html Here's the rest: http://www.reason.com/blog/show/129864.html
http://www.reason.com/blog/show/129865.html
http://www.reason.com/blog/show/129872.html -MeanDean
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14.
I need new BATTERIES!!!!!!
User submits trouble ticket "I need new batteries for my mouse". Responded to let her know where Batteries are located. User submits new trouble ticket "And how in the heck do I put them in?? I emailed you guys because I need help!!" How HARD can it BE????[By: MothMonsterMan / 2008-11-04]
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Resolution: Replaced user's cordless mouse with corded mouse. -NightSteel
Bonus if the luser has taken batteries out of the thing before. -Seamus
Replace batteries with C-4? -CyBear
"PLUS IS POSITIVE! MINUS IS NEGATIVE! Oh, let me!" -Woody -Biosynthetic
Oh no, I had a customer call to complain about her mouse not working. I go look at our display one, tell her EXACTLY how to put the batteries in, confirm it with her 3 times. Still no go. I tell her to bring it in and I can replace it for her. She rants raves about how she lives so far away and demands to speak to my manager about how I "refuse" to help her. Manager spends about 10 minutes on the call doing some fake diagnostics to make the customer happy, finds out there's no light on the bottom of the optical mouse, tells the customer to take the batteries and turn em around. Works perfectly... Despite telling me 3 times they were in correctly... -LazyLemming
No, ma'am. You need 4 D batteries for one that size. -clockkingfl
One wonders if she has her batteries backwards in her dildo, and instead of giving her an orgasm turns her frigid instead. -crazymactech
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15.
US News full of shit on election.
Here's why. "New mexico. Votes for McCain 62%, Votes for Obama 38%, Districts Reported: 5%. Winner: Obama." Seriously... [By: LazyLemming / 2008-11-04]
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This is all filler. THey won't have anything to report on until the spoo-er, erec-er, election is over. -Seamus
It always is. It's only hype until either the concession speech or the morning after. -MadJack
I saw the title, "US News full of shit on election," and thought, "NO!!! Reeeeeally??!?" lol - Well, I voted today. I sure hope I get what I asked for. -FuzzyElf
Sorry Fuzzy, but it's not looking like Riff's gonna win.
-LazyLemming
McCain just made his concession speech... -VWFtech
That's why I was glued to the BBC Online's coverage, as they didn't report states until it was confirmed (like Virginia, Fox News had reported it for Obama at least ten-fifteen minutes before BBC did). -Seamyst
That kind of prediction is based on math and exit polls. The idea being that the precincts that were reporting were probably large ones and had reported in favor of Obama, and CNN's exit poll data also indicated that McCain would not pick up enough votes to come back. It seems like BS on the surface, but there really is a method to the madness. -NightSteel
NightSteel - well, that may be. The results say they're still full of shit. -Seamus
That is, overall... Not necessarily in that example. -Seamus
That's why I never watch election coverage. -thx1138
I was working the door at one Polling Station for a British election and they turned up to do an Exit Poll. They stopped and asked a very small number of those leaving so I have had little faith in Exit Polls ever since -Zoomer
You probably missed where CNN had called Maine for Obama. On hover, the results showed "Obama: 2, McCain: 1". And several states were called with no votes counted. -DrAardvarkian
You've got to understand how they call states on news shows. They look at the exit polls first, then once the results start coming in, they use the first few precincts to determine how close the exit polls are to the real results. If there's very little variation in those first few precincts (less than about 2%, I think) they declare the exit polls to be accurate, and call the state accordingly. So in this case, the first precincts that came in for NM favored McCain, but according to the exit polls, Obama had won the state, and the results they'd seen so far were matching the exit polls (even though those first few results happened to be from red counties). -veaudaux
They certainly called the west coast on the exit polls. They did wait for the polls to close before they announced their predictions, even if they didn't wait more than a minute. -MeasureThrice
DrAV - That may be because Maine doesn't award all their electorals to a single candidate. 2 electorals go to the statewide winner, and then 1 electoral to individual congressional district winners. -LazyLemming
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16.
Remember, remember!
Remember, remember!
The fifth of November,
The Gunpowder treason and plot;
I know of no reason
Why the Gunpowder treason
Should ever be forgot!
Guy Fawkes and his companions
Did the scheme contrive,
To blow the King and Parliament
All up alive.
Threescore barrels, laid below,
To prove old England's overthrow.
But, by God's providence, him they catch,
With a dark lantern, lighting a match!
A stick and a stake
For King James's sake!
If you won't give me one,
I'll take two,
The better for me,
And the worse for you.
A rope, a rope, to hang the Pope,
A penn'orth of cheese to choke him,
A pint of beer to wash it down,
And a jolly good fire to burn him.
Holloa, boys! holloa, boys! make the bells ring!
Holloa, boys! holloa boys! God save the King!
Hip, hip, hooor-r-r-ray! [By: conundrum / 2008-11-05]
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So, whose up for some fireworks at the House of Commons? *bfeg* -CommanderData
'V for Vendetta' is a modern take on it, in comic book or movie (Natalie Portman...Yum!) forms -CTYankee
And http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=214 is the VGCats take on 'V for Vendetta'! :) -Diptera
...And he has to confront the House of Commons (which is like Congress, with a two-drink minimum!). They yell shit back! It's like - 'My worthy opponent-' "OH, FUCK OFF! Enough, you buggery bastard! Move on!" 'Will someone remove Misses Thatcher from the hall, please?' </Robin Williams> -Seamus
I was just watching that last night. Something about watching a movie about people taking back their county seemed apropos. Of course, we'll never have the guts to do it here... -scooby111
You guys know that there was a Guy Fawkes Day before 'V for Vendetta', right? -evolvedstarfish
ESF, that's why I called it a 'modern take' on it. Didn't mean to offend! -CTYankee
Didn't mean to sound offended. Scoob has a point though. How about you guys give it a year, and if you're just as screwed, you remember that your founders used to be Brits next Guy Fawkes day? -evolvedstarfish
Scoob... We already did it. -billybien
That's what you get for mixing Red Bull with PBS. -Biosynthetic
billybien - What's gonna change? You'll get higher taxes, more government control over social issues, more handouts, taking from the rich to give to the poor, more gun control, and more limits of free political speech. In short, you got a more powerful federal government. Not that McCain would be much better... Not exactly a 'win' for freedom. -scooby111
Ah yes, Guy Fawkes - the only person in the last 400 years who had the right idea about Parliament. <bfek9g> -Gromit
Nov 5th - the time when children roam the streets asking for handouts to buy explosives.... Penny for the Guy... -Wonko The Sane
I am so confused. Is this a UK thing? -DarkRookie
Yup. Guy Fawkes night, when Guy and his co-conspirators planned to blow up the Houses of Parliament in England. Shame they caught him... -chazz
It is said that Guy Fawkes was the last person to enter the House of Commons with honorable intent. -Wraith556
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17.
A Royal (Pain) Welcome Back
So, like, I've been away from the office for five weeks on medical leave (it's all good now, albeit not quite as good as it used to be. Good enough, though.). The first day back didn't start out too terribly bad, considering the five-week absence was rather unexpected and unplanned and as such no one around here bothered to set my out-of-office agents on either my email OR my voicemail. I mean, 20+ voicemails and 500+ emails from users wondering about the status of their issues and why they haven't heard back from me was a tad annoying, just not totally unexpected. I've worked here for 17 years, I've learned what to expect. Or rather, what not to expect. Then, in the middle of slogging through the voicemail, the cord on my phone snaps clean off. Great. Find someone who can call in a help ticket, and forget about being able to use the phone until someone gets around to checking their queue. There's still the email queue. Oops, who can remember their passwords from five weeks ago? Another hour wasted while trying to remember how to auto-reset the passwords (like I was going to open another trouble ticket and wait for someone to check their queue again? I'm still waiting for the phone ticket call to be resolved!) only to find out that the passwords had expired anyway, so what did it matter? Reset the password, get onto the machine and attack the email queue. Narrow down the frantic "solve my problem noooowwww!" messages to a relative handful (twenty or so), now I'm ready to try to refresh my memory on what they heck their problems were in the first place. Apparently, they want you to solve the problem, but never bother to provide a recap or even a clue most times, so I brace for the 'guessing' game. That's when I discover the kicker. The one, and I do mean ONE piece of software that I require to DO MY JOB (as in, what they PAY me to do around here, you know?) is complately missing from my desktop. Say what now? 'Oh, right, they upgraded everybody while you were out.' Uh...did not someone notice that while 32,000 people in the company got upgraded to the new client version, there are THREE of us who require the new client AND the corresponding development version???? The development version without which I cannot even begin to guess at what the problems I'm expected to solve are in the first place, let alone solve them at all? Hello? Is anyone home? Can I go home now?[By: emdeebee / 2008-11-05]
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So, you can now honestly say that "I NEED A NEW PHONE!" -Stryker One
With that much stress on your first day back, you could be off work again for another 5 weeks with Stress.... -Wonko The Sane
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18.
R.I.P. Mr. Crichton
Michael Crichton dies at 66.
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/11/05/print/main4575403.shtml[By: TechnoTherapist / 2008-11-05]
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I think I've read just about every book he's written. Sphere always freaked me out. -neuman1812
I liked "Prey". Hope it's a movie soon. -billybien
His explanation of avoiding paradoxes in Timeline was fascinating. And Sphere was also one of my favorites. And who could forget "The Andromeda Strain?" A great science fiction writer will be missed. -RiffRaff
<bows head> r.i.p, sir. you are one of my favourite writers. -AdmiralLaurie
Thanks for posting this, somehow I missed hearing about this (actually not surprising given all the election coverage). I too have read all of his books. I especially liked "Next" even though most people who see it in my collection say they think its one of his worst (my opinion being that "Disclosure" actually was). <Wanders over to bookshelf, grabs "The Great Train Robbery" and opens it to page 1> Here's to you, MC! A great many untold stories died along with you... Actually, looking at Crichton's Wiki page I see that he has a few novels which he released under the pseudonym John Lange. I'll have to see if I can get those. -LinuXtreme
I'm with neuman1812. Sphere was such a great book that the movie couldn't come close to doing it justice. <bows head> -udoshan
I may be in the minority here, but I'm going to thank him for ER. -YourLastHope
I was never a huge fan, but really enjoyed "Congo" and especially "Jurassic Park". The movie versions of both sucked, but the books were great. -thx1138
I third the motion about Sphere, motion carries. (... and then I banged my little gavel ...) <Lart shelter, lart shelter, lart shelter ... HO!> -charred
*Sheds a single tear* You will missed sir, but not forgotten! -unrenowned
I keep wishing they'd make a movie from 'Airframe', another good one. Sadly, he and ER goeth together. -MadJack
The man will be missed. He was 1 of my early forays into the world of science fiction. -RandalGraves
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19.
Didn't want to bump link of the day
I just got picked for the BumpTop beta. Interesting little desktop interface/toy. Check it out here: http://bumptop.com/[By: AmazingKreskin / 2008-11-05]
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Can't see any practical use for this. Especially if it's not ported for *nix. -billybien
Oh hey! I've seen that before, looks pretty spiffy. Let us know how it is. -LazyLemming
Already signed up for the beta... I hope they pick me soon !!! -linuxmatt
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20.
This is proof Democracy does not work nt
And no it has nothin to do with Obama
http://www.bestactever.com/2008/11/06/democracy-is-dead-or-why-mtv-hates-you/
The bastards! [By: starfishmagnet / 2008-11-06]
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< Plays the "RAGE!" clip from Primal Rage video game > ;-) -Necros
"And they killed Kenny, on top of that....YOU BASTARDS!!" -vacuumtubes
um, wow... just wow... -AdmiralLaurie
... Is this a Rickroll? :grin: -Seamus
MTV had an opportunity to rickroll all of europe and refused? They need younger executives. -MeasureThrice
"MTV get off the air!"</Dead Kennedys> -stiffarm
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