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Tech Stories Archives - May 2009

1. Karma does not like me....

Backstory:

I work retail (I know...) and am in charge of a department as well as do the majority of the tech repair work. I'm a former field technician with the same company. So I know a lot of the in's and out's and get a lot of respect from my team because of it.


Today I was told that, because of the higher-ups (read: above the store level), I have one of two choices to make:
1) Stay in my current position and probably be let go in 2 months or
2) drop to a lower position, reducing my hours by 13.

Now, with regards to choice #2, I've been informed that, under no certain terms, I would be given as many hours as possible with the position (more sales == more hours and vice versa), my pay would not be cut, and my benefits would stay intact.

My boss has gone out of his way to point out that he does not want me to leave and that, while it may not seem like it, thinks choice #2 would be in my best interests.


I know a lot of you are screaming "bail out" but I've had this man fight for me in the past and I truly believe that he is not pulling the wool over my eyes on this one. He is one of the rare types of managers that actually cares about his employees and I figure I'm going to stay.

I think that this is my wake-up call to go back and finish off a degree (even if it's in something general) and by the time I finish, if my hours/position hasn't improved, to gracefully exit and seek another job.


My biggest problem is that I keep second guessing myself since all the crap with my ex, the courts, and custody battle. Am I on track with my logic here? Or am I just having another wistful thinking moment? I appreciate the feedback.

[By: unrenowned / 2009-05-01]
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Comments

  • Get it in writing how many hours you are supposed to get. Nobody wants to be stuck in a job where they don't get enough hours. -Ratfor
  • Keep the job, but keep looking for a better one. -Stryker One
  • In the policies laid down by one of our former presidents, trust...but verify. -vacuumtubes
  • Amen to the keep the job and work on education, AND try thinking of ways to improve their processes, partly so you can write this on your next search applications, and partly to rub their noses in it. My gut feeling is you're hosed anyway in three months or so, so, why not make them the 'Really Stupid Clowns' in the piece? And make the underlings all sorts of "If they did it to _____, they'll do it to me even quicker. -jerrybear
  • promises are worth the paper they're not printed on. edumacate! -stiffarm
  • I'd stick with them, but definitely deal with the learning stuff & start looking for alternate work Just In Case. Getting the "downgrade agreement" in WRITING is a Very Important Thing. -Grue
  • Go for 2. You still get paid and you have an extra 13 hours a week to look around for a better job. Think of it as them paying your job search if they come through on the no wage cut. -Zoomer
  • Do not put faith into your belief that someone is not pulling the wool over your eyes UNTIL you are 100% certain that such person isn't ALSO having a hand-knit sock pulled over HIS eyes at a higher level. This message has been brought to you by Sad Experience. -emdeebee
  • Only thing I'd add is, once you have the degree, if the job is still there, hang onto it until you have the new one. You are much more employable if you still have a job. -chazz
  • Didn't Circuit City make a similar decision that bit them in the ass big-time? -thx1138
  • What they all said. -MadJack
  • The only problem with asking for the amount of hours in writing is with Retail, there are no guarantees. Especially with a system such as More Sales = More Hours. -exzyle2k
  • All I can add is this: Get it in writing. -Captain Trips
  • I'm sure I don't need to add get it in writing. I'd be concerned that if you're being paid over your grade level, then you may be the obvious choice if they need to get rid of excess head-count. It may be a good idea to have a long talk with your manager about where you both see your career going from here on, and it may be a good idea to suggest that you get a degree in a business oriented subject. It may help the higher-ups view you as management-material. -rurwin
  • The question I have is, if they can afford not to cut your pay and benefits, then how come they can keep you when they can't if you keep your *position*? You need to know why the position is being cut in the first place to better choose your options. -Enzedder

  • 2. A rose by any other name...


    The PFY has been developing an improved version of our Inventory Control Database. He wants to name the front end "The Inventory Tracking System."

    I agreed and said we should name the back end "Asset System Services."

    I don't expect our acronyms will pass scrutiny. :(

    [By: Tekkie / 2009-05-01]
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    Comments

  • Orchestra and balcony? -SalParadise
  • Problem is, every horny guy will be logging into the TITS and ASS system as much as possible. :) -JoeLugian
  • Surely this all runs on Certified Unix Networking Technology? And secured with a Data-Integrated Cryptographic Key? -OgdenTechGuy
  • Accessed via The Wide Area Terminal Services, presumably. -Gromit
  • So, you just want to get your TITS and ASS past security? -srteach
  • Just don't abbreviate it, they'll never notice! -boxxertrumps
  • " you must have your DICK installed in order to access ASS. once your DICK has ben authenticated through the ASS, you may proceed to use TITS as you would from the office" -Harm
  • Will you employ a File Unifed Computer Technology? -lineswine
  • Just hope you never get a bug in your ASS, or access to TITS will be denied. -ChildofCthulhu

  • 3. What's for dinner? (NT)
    Chicken! In a can! http://ihatemymessageboard.com/2009/04/23/a-whole-chicken-in-a-can/ (SFW)
    [By: Starfury / 2009-05-01]
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    Comments

  • I usually made chicken pot pie with it. -TieDyedDinosaur
  • that stuff makes horrible horrible chicken alfredo. -AdmiralLaurie
  • I understand the market for it, but I wouldn't buy it. What kills me is him complaining about the taste when he poured all the broth, fat, and other potential seasoning down the drain. -Darkridr
  • huh ... ummm okay. thats... well there you go! -Harm
  • http://thesiblog.blogspot.com/2008/01/canned-hamburger-pics-and-review.html -Icelator
  • http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MRE -compbrat
  • People actually EAT that? Ewwww! -lineswine
  • WTF was that. Looks like an Alien to me. And the broth with the chicken limbs sticking out. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww -kennz
  • "Mushytushies" The space age food. it's precooked, prechewed, preswallowed, predigested and preexcreted. All you have to do is heat it up and dump it in the toilet. -atomicbill
  • tastes great with baconnaise -stiffarm

  • 4. Thanks, Joe


    Thanks to JoeLugian, I've thought about the support calls we'd get if we went through with the proposed database names mentioned here: http://www.techcomedy.com/single/new_stories.php?content_number=79446

    "Yeah, I'm trying to get on your TITS and I'm having trouble."

    "The icon is missing and I can't find my ASS."

    "I don't like this frontend. Can you modify my TITS?"

    "Jane has a lot more options in her system. Why does she have bigger TITS than me?"

    I expect there are so many more, but you get the idea. :)

    [By: Tekkie / 2009-05-01]
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    Comments

  • Kinda brings a whole new meaning to "Can ya squeeze me in?" 0.o -Necros
  • Glad I could contribute. Of they really like the system, they would say "This system is just TITS!" and you can say, yes it is!. -JoeLugian
  • The password is nubba-nubba. -vacuumtubes
  • "Why has Jane got bigger TITS than you? She Just Uses Greater Security, that's all." (JUGS anyone?) -Gromit
  • True story: My wife was doc manager for the original M$ ISS scripting project. Her first meeting in the group, she got them to change the dot-3 extention from 'Active Server Scripting' to 'Active Server Pages'. The programmers either hadn't noticed the extention, or were hoping they thier little joke would pass... -MeasureThrice
  • But what happens when the server fails? TITS-up generally does not describe a working server. -PolarCoyote
  • Can we also update the sytem to run on the Millennium Year Application Software System, http://www.ugcs.caltech.edu/~karlh/fun/millenium.html -SwizzleStix
  • What are you going to call the dedicated workstations that use this system? Dedicated Inventory Control Kiosk? Imagine if it broke. :D -MarloVino
  • Ugh. Gazongas. -clockkingfl
  • much better than our training database "fits" because thats what it gives anyone who has to update it. -rhiannon
  • Due to a truncation on a commonly-used screen we had several workers in the "Final Ass" department. That persisted until the system was replaced. -Loren

  • 5. The Punchline
    Graaaaaaains!
    [By: Stryker One / 2009-05-01 ]
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    Comments

  • http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/001030.html http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/001031.html -MeasureThrice

  • 6. Bad Joke Friday
    NT/OT (with thanks to The Mens Room) What do vegan zombies eat?
    [By: Stryker One / 2009-05-01 ]
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    Comments

  • graaaaaaiiinnnnsss... What do undead Garth's eat? -Chipsterian
  • Gubru ? <10 points for ref> -AngrySup
  • Timmay! -vacuumtubes
  • Waaaayyyynnnneeesss. But on the other-hand, NT but on topic...http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/funny-pictures-your-child-watched-too-many-zombie-movies.jpg -AngrySup
  • Angry Sup...Uplift Universe? -lineswine

  • 7. NT/OT - Apple can suck it...
    Took my younger bro to the west edmonton mall and we popped into the Apple store, I'm wearing my "no, I will not fix your computer" T-Shirt. The greeter saw me and laughed and said "Ha Ha! You won't have to do that here". I wanted to punch him in the head! Apple freaks piss me off!
    [By: Caboose447 / 2009-05-02]
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    Comments

  • The reason you won't have to fix any Apple computers is because it costs around US$15M to become an Apple-certified tech. Also, if a computer breaks the Apple store will just upsell 'em rather than try to fix it. -OgdenTechGuy
  • I went into an apple store once. They don't even CARRY cmos batteries -Spyder19
  • Maybe he just meant they're the ones fixing them. -Icelator
  • Like an Apple Store actually has Apple-cert techs? (I work for a company that is Apple-certified, keep in mind). -Dragones
  • Hmm... http://www.ctrlaltdel-online.com/comics/20021126.jpg and http://www.ctrlaltdel-online.com/comics/20050608.jpg *Ghost! Open the door!! OPEN THE FREAKING DOOR!!* -unrenowned
  • Anyone else think that Ethan should get Lucas's boss as a business partner? -VFox
  • you can't even get MacBook batteries at the Apple Store, much less CMOS... & why? 'Cause neither is *user-replaceable*!!!!! -CTYankee

  • 8. Funniest damn thing I ever heard
    Okay, so walking customer through creating a dial-up connection (because didn't occur to him that he'd need to A) Have the phone cable plugged into his modem and not his NIC and B) To have the connectoid created before trying to open IE. Meanwhile, at the point where he actually has to enter data into fields to create the connection, he calls for someone to help him. The "someone" turns out to be a kid that sounds a LITTLE older than my eldest, so think five or six years old! And the kid? Very carefully and slowly walks his dad through entering things in, including sounding a little frustrated after having to tell him several times that he doesn't NEED the capslock on to make big letters.
    [By: Dragones / 2009-05-03]
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    Comments

  • Poor kid, and HAHAHAH <breathe> HAHAHAHAHAHAHA -Chipsterian
  • three dead trolls strike again -PolarCoyote
  • The force is strong in that youngling. -flapjackboy
  • PolarCoyote, I only WISH I had thought to ask if there was a kid in the house. I have NEVER actually had a call where someone plugged a phone cable into the NIC before today. And I'm NOT a spring chicken in this field. -Dragones
  • My daughter was providing support in school from the age of 7. "Have you plugged it in miss?" and all the basic stuff. It has not left her with complete faith in human intelligence! -Holdfast
  • Too true, Holdfast, but it has left her with an accurate one... Lowlyte Jr is now 9 and already asks whether they know if they have the right config for the software. -lowlyte
  • I'm giving the kid high marks, plus +25 bonus points for finding a way to bypass the moron gene that the youngling could have inherited from dear old dad. -cert2b
  • Well, I've never had a call with a phone wire in the NIC but I've seen it. -Loren

  • 9. (OTNT) Gatchaman info / help?
    I know I've been gone a while guys - sorry. Not been having a good year, mostly; emotionally not been fun, lost my domain hosting when BuffNET (my old workplace) went T.U... you get the idea...

    Well, one thing I did, recently, was re-watch the DVD set I have for Science Ninja Team GATCHAMAN... and decided to remake the team... So... here it is: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/2249681

    TinyTribble and I are going to do the Ride for Roswell again this year... 3 mile course instead of 8 (they say they created it SPECIFICALLY with her in mind). Considering she did 6 out of 8 miles last year, I think we'll do JUST fine. (OH! BTW - if * raise $3k USD or my team raises $5k, I'm shaving my head bald.. Just so you all know.)

    [By: ShujinTribble / 2009-05-03]
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    Comments

  • WB, Tribble! < Hugs TT > -Necros
  • Dare da, dare da, dare da Sora no kanata ni odoru kage Shiroi tsubasa no Gatchaman Inochi wo kakete tobidaseba Kagaku Nimpo Hinotori da Tobe! Tobe, tobe, Gatchaman Yuke! Yuke, yuke, Gatchaman... Ahh, the treasures of a misspent youth! -charred
  • Best of luck. I've always wondered what a bald Tribble would look like. ;D -VFox
  • Bald tribbles get freeze-dried, coated with resin, and used as cue balls. *bfeg* -RiffRaff

  • 10. A new beginning (NT)

    The old crybaby boss is now gone. We have already found out she didn't give all the passwords to the financial software, so a few phone calls to the respective institutes have gotten her locked out and the new lady in. Met the new boss lady this morning. She is very friendly and seems nice. She worked here a few years ago and everyone that remembers her from then has come in with huge smiles on their faces and given her a hug, so that's a good sign. I'm still in the process of changing over all the various and sundry accounts to her name, and I've gotten her slightly oriented on what I did know of what my boss did, so she is off to a running start. I wish her the best of luck because I have a feeling she's going to need it cleaning up after that woman's mess.

    Later today I will be playing "Ding Dong the Witch is Dead" on a continuous loop in honor of the crybaby being gone. [By: redfaery / 2009-05-04]
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    Comments

  • Yay!!! So happy for you!!! -tixarah
  • Personally, I'd play "Get Over It" by The Eagles but then again, I'm an old man. < Blush > -Necros
  • "Do you want the real work related stuff $OLDBOSS did, or what $OLDBOSS actually did?" "Work related only, please." "Not a damn thing." ;) Best of luck! -ralphp1024
  • I'd prefer "The Roof is on Fire" by the Bloodhound Gang... -vacuumtubes
  • "It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine." -Olorin
  • Gotta love it when the old craptastic bosses get axed, and new cooler ones come in. My new supervisor rocks, and he don't take no crap from anybody, but he and I are already on really good terms. -elcapitane
  • Congrats on the change in $boss! I have a feeling that considering the swath that $previousboss cut through everyone, the new boss is going to be cut some slack in putting things back together. -Voz
  • More than halfway thru the day, so far so good. She's picking up on things pretty fast. She and I have already talked and she said she likes things organized so we're working together to get things organized and on a schedule which has not been done before. People who have worked here a long time have been coming in on and off and giving her hugs. -redfaery
  • Awesome success story, Red. A rare thing, indeed! :) -Seamus
  • you lucked out. generally craptabulous bosses like her will manage to get you fired too. I hereby give you a much deserved WOOT! -HappyCrappy
  • Very nice. Congrats! -PTSTech
  • Congrats! Good luck with the new boss! -rosemetal

  • 11. Shameless plug
    I built my new rig a little over a week ago, and I quickly came to realize that my 1k power supply was having a bit of trouble providing power to all my drives and fans, so I decided to bit the bullet and order a 1.6k watt PS from FrozenCPU.com. I ordered it on Friday, and I checked this morning on $deliveryServiceSite, and it's already on the truck out being delivered to my home. I didn't pay anything extra for shipping, but darn that's fast.
    [By: elcapitane / 2009-05-04]
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    Comments

  • Shipping so fast, it's already on the truck. Prices so low, it just fell off... -VFox
  • 1.6 kilowatts? I thought the trend was to less power since the old p4 days. -boxcar
  • Well, besides the processor and memory, I've got a high end video card, a BluRay Burner, Plextor DVD Burner, a SSD, and a 1 TB Drive, not to mention a Sound Blaster X-Fi Elite Pro :) -elcapitane
  • And did I mention my Full tower case has 9x80mm fans with LED's? -elcapitane
  • 1.21 GIGAWATTS?!?!? :P -OgdenTechGuy
  • ... And it's mounted on Cinder Blocks ... And plays "Big Mutha Truckers!" pretty darn fast. < LART Shelter! GO! > -Necros
  • does it play crysis? -boxcar
  • ... At 800x600 , boxcar ;-) -Necros
  • okay.. i'm kinda dub but, how much stuf do tyou have installed that requires over 1.5k of power?! srly? HD's dont take up that much.. or fans... -Harm
  • Harm: It's cuz his rig doubles as a beer cooler ;-) -Necros
  • I've got a cigg lighter and a cup holder in mine... -Spyder19
  • It's not the total power that's usually the problem, it's too much power being pulled on one particular line (usually a 12V rail). e.g. unit supplies 36A at 12V but this is actually split into three 12A lines. That setup will not work well with four 7A devices or even a single 15A device. I've only seen a couple of 1.6kW units and none of them had high efficiency ratings which only gets worse with a lighter load. -AussieFoot
  • You need water cooling. There should never be a need for 9 fans. -FreakyFerret
  • 9 fans? How much you pay for the sound proofing so you can hear the uber soundcard and the bolts to stop it from lifting off? -SirJosh

  • 12. NT: Newspaper's Didn't Die......
    http://leasticoulddo.com/comic/20090504
    [By: adarklite / 2009-05-04]
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    Comments

  • I always get local paper flunkies coming to my door trying to get me to subscribe. I always say, "That's so retro! I don't think I've actually held a newspaper in my hand since 1998!" They always go away after that. If only newspapers had upgraded to where I could download it in my favorite coffee house onto my Palmpad years ago, they might still have a chance. -Biosynthetic
  • I still get the local paper every morning so I can do the Jumble and Soduku over breakfast. -TieDyedDinosaur
  • Amazons making a larger Kindle for newpapers, large format stuff. Closer to cyberpunk everyday, now we just need a few mass-driver satellites. -Darkridr
  • Crosswords are more fun when done on newspaper in ink over coffee and music on a lazy Sunday morning. -MadJack
  • I subscribe to the local rag. How else am I gonna get my comics? Bonus thought: Change a few words and that strip could be about the American auto industry. -Mushroom

  • 13. Laptops laptops everywhere...
    Since I've inherited the laptop situation at work, I've discovered the complexities (and egos) involved with doling out laptops. Two cases in point:
    • Thursday, I was told that $higherUp was really frustrated with his laptop, and as such requested we have a newer one ready for him ASAP, preferrably by Wednesday afternoon. I was off Friday, so this morning, I get started on it. I downloaded the image from our image server, and a BSOD. OK, at first I thought the coffee hadn't kicked in yet and I may have clicked on the wrong model of laptop image to DL. I try again, and same thing, no joy. Ruh roh. Now I'm on my 2nd laptop, and the third try downloading the image, and I'm hoping a BSOD doesn't occur, because I still have to throw $encryption, a firewall, and VPN software on there.
    • One of our research departments decided to, on their own, purchase a second-hand laptop without telling us. Then last Thursday, my supervisor and I get this e-mail saying the laptop needs to be encrypted right now. We ask where they got this laptop from which was never inventoried by us, and after they drop some names, he and I are both in agreement that unless someone higher up the food chain than us states, in writing, that we can encrypt this thing with our software, we're not even touching it.

      Well, that statement, in writing comes, and a lady comes by to drop it off. She leaves, and I power up the laptop only to find that they've slapped a password on the Admin account. I e-mail the person who started this whole fiasco, asking for the password, and how without it, I can't even so much as start, let alone do everything I need to. Still no response.
      [By: elcapitane / 2009-05-04]
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      Comments

    • One word. UBCD4WIN -Spyder19
    • nope, fdisk, format, reinstall, doo dah ;) -McSmiley
    • "But, it needs to be secured! We can't let you have that password!" <probably the same person who needed to send a confidential fax, so they sealed it up in an envelope before running it through the fax machine> -Voz
    • Make it replacement parts (memory, hard drive) for another laptop... -FormerSithLord
    • Feh. Give him the same laptop with some unicorn stickers on it and send him away. -Biosynthetic
    • paint it pink and put "My Little Kitty" stickers all over it, then send it back. -ecoli
    • change the SATA drive in the BIOS to Compatibility from AHCI. That should solve the blue screen issues with the image. I've had it happen to me a number of times. -SwedishChef
    • Meh : http://home.eunet.no/~pnordahl/ntpasswd/bootdisk.html -Necros
    • change the SATA drive in the BIOS to Compatibility from AHCI. That should solve the blue screen issues with the image. I've had it happen to me a number of times. -SwedishChef
    • Gods, this sounds so much like my days here at $We_Build_Jetliners. So very much like my days sometimes... VPN, whole disk encryption, last second manglement promises... where's the rum in the vending machine? They've got the coca cola, but where's the rum? -VoiceOfSanity

    14. Semi-Luddite Moving Day


    A co-worker, who is moving from a site 32 miles away from this office to one that's just across town from me just stopped by to request equipment. It seems that she needs an LCD to replace her CRT, as her desk is smaller at the new office. Also, she left her desk phone at the old office, as she changed the voice mail message to let callers know her new phone number.

    I managed to explain to her that the voice mail system is maintained by our telco, so she didn't need to leave the phone sitting in an empty office. She will be able to check messages for her old phone number from her new office, as it's the same telco for both sites.

    Now I'm waiting for her to come ask me to move the icons from her old CRT to the new LCD. And I'm tempted to tell her they aren't compatible, so I'll have to convert them from CRT format to LCD format for her.

    [By: Tekkie / 2009-05-04]
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    Comments

  • And remember to mention that they might require re-orientation if her desk is facing a different compass point! -TieDyedDinosaur
  • To bowdlerize a REM tune: "Stand in the place where you work...Now GET OUT!!" -vacuumtubes
  • Don't forget to re-size the resolution if the desk is smaller- they need to maintain the proper proportion! -Voz

  • 15. Win 7 RC1 available for download
    Not a story, but didn't want to bump the link / soapbox:

    http://www.microsoft.com/windows/windows-7/download.aspx

    Apparently M$ is really trying to get this out there.... I saw it in /. , in an article about how it runs on an entry-level netbook.
    [By: CTYankee / 2009-05-05]
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    Comments

  • "The RC will expire on June 1, 2010. Starting on March 1, 2010, your PC will begin shutting down every two hours." So How is this different than Xp or Vista lol -Crai
  • Crai: At least you get a warning that isn't a blue screen XD -Necros
  • Crai, you so funnnyyy! Have you actually tried Windows 7 at all? It's what Vista SHOULD have been from the beginning! I'm using RC1 and it's awesome! I don't think I can go back to Vista now, and I just hate having to use WinXP at work! Win7 is going to be awesome once it's finally avail. to the public! -Caboose447
  • yeah, but will MS do righ and replace Fistya free? prolly not, hmmm? -HappyCrappy
  • Recommended 16 to 20gb for install! Can someone confirm it takes that much space, thats a big chunk for an entry level netbook. -neodemi
  • Caboose, I hear you. I've already done full testing on all applications and normal websites and all hardware at work. Win7 works perfectly with it all. I'm going to be deploying a few select users with 7RC sometime this week (including myself). In a month or so, we're getting new computers for all the staff and new servers for the entire org. So in a couple of months, I suspect all users to be on 7RC. It's going to be interesting. -FreakyFerret
  • neodemi: yes it does. I believe it's 14 GB for 32 bit and 20 GB for 64, but you get a wee bit back (but not much) after it cleans up the install. -ThinTheHerd
  • I'm seriously tempted to give RC1 a try on 64 bit, mainly becaise my current rig has more than 4 GB or RAM -elcapitane
  • Windows 7? That's great, that version will solved all our problems. (Fishes around under couch cushions for $400). Hey Bill, is this enough? -Biosynthetic
  • Biosynthetic - Where's the version of Ubuntu (or any other linux flavor) that will let me run AutoCAD Civil 3D? Until then, I'll use XP, and hope W7 does what XP does better. Vista didn't. -Divinar
  • Thanks for the link CT! I wrote up a little Story about my experiences this past evening -elcapitane

  • 16. A simple job...
    My friend's wife was given her old (1.5yr) desktop when she left her job. Since the computer is part of a domain and the login account doesn't have admin rights. He asked me if I could reinstall Windows. (for pay) I said yes and his wife gave me the computer yesterday...where she proceeds to tell me that there's data she'd really like to save AND that it's not starting up with just an amber light on the front of the case. Tonight should be fun to figure out what's wrong with it.
    [By: Starfury / 2009-05-05]
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    Comments

  • PNordhl (or some variation thereof) once you get it to actually booting. Or pull the drive, pull the data, and reinstall $FREE_OS of choice. -ralphp1024
  • Pull the drive, backup what you can ( usually a linux distro does the trick here), format to teh barebones and load 'er up -Harm
  • If its a Dell with a solid amber light, you prolly got a bad processor or motherboard there. -DarkRookie
  • The Dell's with a amber light will sometimes miraculously fix if you unplug them overnight. -Griffin2020

  • 17. Update on the laptop situation...
    OK, so the laptop situation has evolved somewhat:
    • The doctor who wanted the updated laptop didn't want the one I was going to give him, but instead wanted one of the ones with 11" screens. Apparently size did matter to him when he was travelling (down Burrkiss, down!). So now I have to cotact the other laptop guy who's at the other site to get one of the mini laptops up here, since only he has them. Oh yes, and another person suddenly found out we have them and has requested them.
    • The laptop that was not purchased through us has been encrypted, but it has become incredibly bogged down with said encryption, mostly because the laptop was a refurbished deal with 256 MB of RAM, with tons of software from both $rhymeswithHell and $rhymeswithBulletMackard on it clogging up what little memory was available. Before I even put the encryption on it, I wiped off as much of that software as I could along with CD burning software, which is a huge no-no on anything we have with patient data. That freed up a bit, but the encryption did the trick. My guess is, they're not gonna like what they see, and whine and gripe to get a new one.
    • On top of that, I've got doctors coming in on a near hourly basis requesting new laptops because the previous person essentially gave them all old beasts or systems on their last legs, while harding most of the newer ones. I've done what I can to update them, but it's like trying to fill an ocean with three pebbles. My boss is quite understanding of this, and told me that if'n I have an issue with a doctor who can't grasp that our laptop supply isn't limitless, he'll talk to them personally.
    [By: elcapitane / 2009-05-05]
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  • "I understand you want a new laptop, however you will need to transfer 10k$ into IS's budget per laptop that we purchase. No we won't support an externally purchased laptop." -Olorin
  • Wait, "both $rhymeswithHell and $rhymeswithBulletMackard" software? Who made the machine? (The reason I buy Vostro's - they come with only two stupid programs that need to be removed) -Divinar
  • Divinar: Only two? Hmm... one is Vista. Which one is the other? -TheGhost
  • Ghost - Win XP, of course! Seriously, I can still spec XP Pro (Vista downgrade) and NO McAfee, NO MS Works, and nothing to kill except the Dell "helper" app in the corner. -Divinar
  • Pony's on the other had have lots of shit to shift. :-P -r3tude
  • schedule them appointments, then have them sit in a waiting room for a hour before you rush them into a scrip for expensive diagnostics and pooter medicine. -stiffarm
  • Divinar- that's why I buy XP "downgrades", they do not have any of the crapware installed... -Griffin2020

  • 18. Company Policy
    Sort of a me-POTD. So today, I asked a co-worker to query a certain database for information, and when she got the information I needed, I asked for something more specific that required her to rewrite the query. I apologized for not asking for the more specific information in the first place, and she told me it was fine, she needed to use her brain now and then. So I told her, "You just be careful. You know that's against company policy!" I can't decide if that's funny or sad..
    [By: NightSteel / 2009-05-05]
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  • Wait, you mean there are companies that let you use your brain? where are they and how can I apply? -Olorin
  • Something along the lines of 'non-supported abuse of equipment'? -TieDyedDinosaur
  • No, that's 'abuse of non-supported equipment'. -VFox
  • No, abuse of non-supported equipment is what Burrkiss does when he goes commando. -concept14

  • 19. Bummer, dude...
    Just saw this on the news: Dom DeLuise dead at 75. http://movies.msn.com/movies/article.aspx?news=407275>1=28101 He had teh true funneh.
    [By: MadJack / 2009-05-05]
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  • Headless Ponch! -Biosynthetic
  • Sheriff of Rottingham: Don Giovanni, if I may say so, your lizard looks limp. Don Giovanni: [holding lizard] Yeah, well, when you get to be my age... Oh! My lizard! Oh yeah! </Robin Hood:MIT> And lets not forget the prestige that comes with being "the leading gynecologist in Pompeii" either. Farewell! -LinuXtreme
  • The article didn't even mention his appearance on Stargate SG1. :( -Tekkie
  • That episode was EPIC!!! -PTSTech
  • Anyone ever see him in "Hot Stuff" from the late 70's-early 80's... Dom at his best! -VWFtech
  • Dom was at his best most of the time! Farewell, good sir! -Voz
  • Farewell Mr. DeLuise. May $deity$ take you to heaven at ludicrous speed. -TheGhost

  • 20. WiFi network names
    Didn't want to bump the lod, but thought this was pretty funny. http://oddee.com/item_96525.aspx
    [By: Ramblin / 2009-05-06]
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  • Makes me want to go home and rename my network "(.)(.) Boobies"...at least until my wife found out. ;) -docbrown01
  • Some of those would certainly get your attention. :) I might go home & name mine TANSTAAFL. -Tekkie
  • I named mine "Byte-Me", just cause I thought it was funny. -Gunpe
  • Ah yes, reminds me of this (http://www.techcomedy.com/single/new_stories.php?content_number=71994) My SSID is SeriesofTubes but we have it set to hidden. -silvermoon
  • I named mine "NSA node 19345.23" just to screw with any local paranoids -dredtech
  • I had a friend once break into a wifi spot a chinesse restaurant on campus. He changed thier SSID to "HAHAIpeedinyourrice". The owner was not happy. -cert2b
  • A "NOT YOURS" started showing up on the list here a few days ago. -clockkingfl
  • Mine's called FuzzyBoys :) Don't tell Burkiss! :o -FreakyFerret
  • I named the one at my mom's house "Secured Wireless. Ha, Ha." I figured no one in the neighborhood would be smart enough to try it, and I turned on the encryption...erm...till my boyfriend got on in fifteen minutes...withOUT the password. This is what I get for sleeping with a programmer! -TranceGemini

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