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Tech Stories Archives - September 2010
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1.
Maybe she can give him lessons... As I'm going through old notes from long-gone sales reps, I found a real gem of irony. The client is in Turkey, and the last note given about the client says "She speaks well English".[By: ActingUpAgain / 2010-09-01]
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Comments The return of George. - AmazingKreskin Are havening George issues again? -Captain Trips
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2.
Goodbye, Ubuntu - It Was Fun For A While
Looks like we will be switching from Ubuntu to OpenSUSE here at Peyton Place. Ubuntu was great until they hit version 9.10, and since then it's just been more work to get things running than what I want to deal with. Just tried OpenSUSE 11.3 on a test system here, and everything worked out of the box, except for one network printer that I had to manually download and install the driver for.
I'll be switching my laptop and $CFO's laptop this weekend, then purchasing new quad-core desktops for Accounting and installing OpenSUSE on them as well. I'll let the backup servers and file servers continue with Ubuntu until the next time I have to reinstall the OS, then switch them. Other workstations throughout the company will be migrated gradually as time and circumstances allow.
A part of me will miss Ubuntu; it's the first Linux distro I used and cut my teeth on. I learned a lot. But I look forward to more stability and less hacking to get stuff to work properly.
[By: RiffRaff / 2010-09-01]
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Comments I'm the other way 'round - SuSE was the first one I tried, and later went over to Kubuntu. (I get paid to ne a Windows admin now, so I've lost touch with Linux) -TheCyberwolfe What counts is that it's still linux! - Grue So true grue. Now you might want to try Slackware. --- Runs to lart shelter
-kennz haters - please don't hate, but I've never got involved with Linux. Slightly concerned by "the next time I have to reinstall the OS" - Um WTH? why? -SoldierJedi SJ: Usually only happens when a drive fails or I have to switch a server over to a different machine. At Peyton Place, most of my servers are the oldest machines in the company, simply because the task they're performing doesn't require a lot in the way of resources. Looks great on my budget. But the downside is a higher rate of hardware repairs. - RiffRaff I'm currently experimenting with Fedora 13 myself... -JoeLugian Half of the issues I had with installing Ubuntu 10.4 were with third-party software (like the Amazon mp3 downloader) not updating their @(*$% dependencies. - Seamyst I tired Mint 9 for a while. Fun until I lost around 60GB of HDD space and had no idea where it went to. The music, videos, and pron were all accounted for. - DarkRookie
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3.
PSSST ... Need a job in the DC Area? Posted in the Break Area: http://www.techcomedy.com/members/message_board/viewtopic.php?p=162933#162933[By: Necros / 2010-09-01]
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Comments how does someone live on <50K year in DC? Just curious. -figglywig Live in Virginia or Maryland and commute. Commute a LOT. -Mer Or be in the military -Spacegoat
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4.
You win, Mr. Lucas. So there's been an update to the story I posted about George Lucas and his cry of foul against a company named "Jedi Mind Inc." Apparently, they have suddenly dropped all affiliation with the name "Jedi." I'm guessing Lucas threatened to send Jar-Jar Binks after them.
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/09/01/jedi_mind_renamed/[By: KrazerKap / 2010-09-01]
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Comments Other than the word Jedi, I see no correlation between the company and Mr Lucas' cash-cow... er... franchise. Congratulations George, you've just tied with Steve Jobs in the title for the world's biggest douche. -Wraith556 I'm with George on this one, they were definitely going for a star wars thing with Jedi Mind. -Icelator Control-sa. Alt-sa. Delete-sa. Game over. And all the lawyers get their pound of flesh. - vacuumtubes I can kinda understand on this one tho. Like Games Workshop. If they dont stop it straight away, theres a precedent for other people to use other parts of Star Wars, and when he hollers, they point at this and go "But he got away with it" -ApolloSZ I think John Edwards still has the award for biggest douce in the universe. -Phylok You say people gonna die!!!! -Blue3c
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5.
Addiction=Lawsuit WIN? Okay so some guy in Hawaii decided to get Lineage II, and became addicted to it. He logs more than 20,000 hours into it and somehow from that is suffering from severe emotional distress and depression. He decides to blame the game company that created it. They quote the EULA, but apparently there's something in the states of TX and HI that nullifies parts of it, to where they are now liable for this man's mental health problems. I'm sorry to inform you, fishy, but if you are having mental problems from a game, SHUT IT OFF!!!!
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/08/31/lineage_ii_eula_defeat/
[By: KrazerKap / 2010-09-01]
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Comments mental problems from lack of responsibility and stupidity -srteach Already being discussed in the break room: http://www.techcomedy.com/members/message_board/viewtopic.php?t=11165 . Obviously the person needs to get a life and take responsibility for themselves. -Wraith556 I read that to counteract "addiction" FF14 will reduce the experience and loot earned by players who are logged in more than 8hrs/wk. I've never had enough bandwidth or a high enough data cap to get into on-line play and have this be a problem. - AussieFoot O-Crack. 'Nuff said. - RiffRaff Why on earth would somebody who lives in a paradise like Hawaii spend that much time playing a game? Go outside and enjoy the weather, stupid!!! -Park7 Park7 - While I understand what you meant, the weather in Hawaii is FAR from my idea of "paradise". I'd be inside, in the dark, AC on high, hiding from the evil Daystar. -Divinar New game EULA: "Game may not be played in TX or HI because of this one guy this one time. Contact your Senator if you want this fixed." -Geminii
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6.
SEVEN SECONDS!! The boss asked me to sign off on a call review in the scorekeeping system and after I did a popup came up onscreen saying YOUR AVERAGE HANDLE TIME IS 357 SECONDS - COMPANY EXPECTATION IS 350 SECONDS - LEVEL ONE WARNING. I was like "wtf?" I turned to him and pointed, and he laughed and said it was weird people get that 'warning' since company expection is actually about a minute more, and I have one of the lowest handle times on my team.[By: Mushroom / 2010-09-02]
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Comments I'll see your Level One Warning and raise it with a Level Five Take-Your-Seven-Seconds-And-Shove-Them-Up-Your-Pale-White-Executive-Ass Alert - RiffRaff i'll see that warning and raise you a Dangerouse Eyebrowe, a whithering look and an uncomfortable slience that goes on for a few seconds longer then it should, followed by a "I see". My own TL's generally left me alone.. other TL's trying to step in and do some " good" for the company and " help" got the Vetinary treatment -Harm I'm assuming they dropped the warning. If not, the call review system team needs a warning -McSmiley I am having talks for my handle time for being to low. Still miss the mark for dead air. - DarkRookie I am so happy that ACD is not one of our KPIs. We look at it, but there is no set policy on what it is supposed to be. Makes the job of running the desk much nicer. Our KPI is Customer Sat, and if the customer is happy you win. -torgo I work in a place where "first call resolution" isn't strictly connected to whether the issue was resolved in one call. Customer happy, company unhappy. - Mushroom I remember the days of 17 minutes to spend 5 of with the standard greeting then drag name, address, serial number, real name, real address, not the monitor serial number. Then explain warranty information...to have 2 minutes left to troubleshoot an issue that the fishy describes as 'it's broken' and trying to sell them crap they don't need on top of fixing the issue. I don't miss those days. -Olorin First thought that comes to mind is RoboCop and ED209. "You have 20 seconds to comply!" - AussieFoot
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7.
Work Chat o' the Day 2 Sup: if you copy from Kaspersky and use it before it's been tested, you could wax a machine
Me: Been lucky then
CW: wax on wax off lol
Sup: and get written up in the process for using unapproved tool
Me: I mean good thing I didn't do that
CW: LOL[By: Jack / 2010-09-02]
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Comments Using an unapproved tool is considered rape. - Mushroom
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8.
NO. NO NO NO NO NO. NO. No. I will NOT support your USB TYPEWRITER. NO. I may have to support your credit card machines, your faxes and your copiers and all your other devices that plug into an electrical circuit, including your GD'd shredder, but I swear to god, I will NOT support a USB typewriter.
http://www.etsy.com/shop/usbtypewriter[By: MrsCheezil / 2010-09-02]
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Comments What does USB need with a typewriter? </mangled Kirk quote> -VFox As a geek toy, those a pretty fucking cool. For the average user, pain in the ass. - AmazingKreskin cool - and i can see SOME use to it... but notb a keyoard replacment... -Harm Kewl! An instant-printing word processor! </NTPFY> -Dr Jerkyl O MAMA MIA MAMA MIA LET ME GO - Jack But it doesn't look like they work as printers. There's something to say for type-writters in that they actually impact the paper. -AngrySup Would you support this? http://www.datamancer.net/steampunklaptop/steampunklaptop.htm -RDMcMains
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9.
Best prank I have been victom to. nt/ot Well to get the idea whats going on, you have to know Ontario tax. we recently changed from having a provincial tax and a federal tax to just having one "harmonized" tax, called the HST.
Now what happend was a group of people went around various areas of Toronto leaving letters in mailboxes with the government of Canada letterhead on it. Each letter was done saying that with the new HST no person should be charged HST or any tax what-so-ever on TV or other telecomunication services.
That letter itself led me to have a call lasting 2 hours trying to explain that the person was the victom of a prank. He did not understand that Governemnt of Canada mail comes in very specific envelopes and not plain white ones with just Government of Canada Tax Department, written on it. Though apart from that one detail, whom ever made that I have a hard time disliking, oh sure the customer for falling for the prank I was rather annoyed with, but the one Purpotrating it, I have a small amount of respect for pullin off a stunt like that. Come to think of it though, its not the customer who is the victom of the prank, or anyone who gets the letters, The people who this prank is really aimed at is call center agents, and that I have to laugh at the inginuity and the bordom it took to come up with it.[By: ZombieBear / 2010-09-02]
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Comments That's a Federal offense, messing with the mail. Task tsk. - ThinTheHerd only if they try to take or tamper with mail. Sending it on the other hand is usually not a crime. -PolarCoyote didnt get one of those .. but i know what the brown evelope looks like.. little window in the front.. govment dept on the back..
i hate the CRA.... -Harm
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10.
Don't mind me, I'm just a professional. Spent HOURS (ok, minutes) explaining to boss about how you indeed CAN have a link from ONE WEBSITE TO ANOTHER. Ahem. Because. That is what the WEB is. Explained how when you go to google and click a link, it is taking you from one website (google) to another. This was the wrong example because "Google ISN'T A WEBSITE. It's a SEARCH engine." Right. Let's start again. *Rinse, repeat.[By: MrsCheezil / 2010-09-02]
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Comments Oh, and BTW? I am calling in sick tomorrow. -MrsCheezil Somebody took the training wheels off his computer too soon? - concept14 Fscking OUCH! The Stupid! It Burns! - Seamus DEMON IGNORANCE! YOU MUST BE EXCERSISED! THE POWER OF TECH COMPELS YOU! THE POWER OF TECH COMPELS YOU! - KrazerKap man, i remember when there were no links on the internet, and forget about searching if you didn't know what you were looking for you were screwed, we'd spend days loading a page, and if the asshole webmaster dared to put a picture on it you would DOS that site out of vengance. /old fart -drachen jaws 3.7, windows 98 - AdmiralLaurie ahh hyperlinks... -Harm Krazer's comment reminded me of this cartoon: http://dilbert.com/strips/comic/1995-11-09/ -Erictheblue
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12.
No parent should have to bury their kids Karma is requested here. Yesterday morning, we got the parents' worst nightmare phone call. My (step-)son was found dead of an apparent overdose. Please forgive my bringing down the blues here, but I need all the friends I can get to help me through this. Today we fly from California to Florida to "make the final arrangements." So I ask for travel karma for my wife and me, and also for my son, wherever he is traveling now.[By: Captain Trips / 2010-09-03]
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Comments Karma inbound. I'm not sure what to say other than "I'm sorry". - AdmiralLaurie Damn, my condolences. :( Travel safe. -Olorin wow, not sure what to say but "I'm sorry for your loss" -Tarantulus Where in Florida, dear? If you're near Tampa and need ANYTHING....let me know. -TechieSidhe Inbound karma coming. Take as much as you need. - Dante668 So sorry for your loss. *hug* - K9Insanity karma, condolences, hugs...what ever you need! - gashach holy crap... Yea.. all the karma i got and then some.. my condolences. -Harm Whatever karma I can spare is yours - skippytpodar Good lord. Please take all the karma and good thoughts you can in this hard time. I am not a religious man, but I pray I never have to do this. Please be well and know that many people hold you in their thoughts this weekend. -SalParadise I'm at a loss for words and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I'm so sorry for your loss. -CathyV I really don't know what to other than I will keep you and yours in my prayers. I hope I never have to go through this myself. -Crispy06 Oh, fuck. My deepest sympathies. Anything I can do... - MadJack Karma, condolences, and all goodwill I can spare are inbound. We're here if ya need a shoulder, Cap. - Seamus Damn, I'm sorry. Karma inbound. *hugs* - Seamyst Truely a tragedy, all the karma I have is yours. -Icelator I've attached several truck loads of Karma Kittens to the wings. Remember that they can also be used as floatation devices in the event of an emergency. Godspeed. - unrenowned Thank you all. We'll be in Jupiter, flying in to West Palm Beach tonight. I'll try to update then, maybe taking this to the break room. -Captain Trips Ouch. I can't even imagine what it's like, but you have my sympathies. -Divinar Oh no, very sorry to hear it. It sends chills through me to think of having to go through that. -MrsCheezil My condolences. May your journey be safe, and go as well as may be expected. - Diptera *hugs* -pixel Condolences from Casa de Chef. - SwedishChef You and yours are in my thoughts and prayers. -frprinterwiz ouch man, you have all that I can spare. -Phylok My thoughts and condolences are with you... - Voz There really are no words, so I'll just say I'm sorry for your loss. - sassicatz I'm terrible at consoling people, but you have my sincerest efforts. -linuxmatt Fuck. Sending karma/prayers your way. -Spacegoat Wow, I'm sorry. Karma coming in. -Frazzled So sorry for your loss, sending hugs, love ans prayers and all the travel karma that I can muster up - THETECHFROMHELL T_T I am so sorry to hear this. Sending love and wishes for a safe journey for you and your wife and your son wherever he is. -Angelace sorry man - Hawk :( I'm so sorry!!!! *lots of hugs from up here* -taieena Sorry to hear that, my thoughts and prayers are with you. - 0gr3 Sending all the karma I can.
- Stryker One As a mother myself, you have my sympathies... -TinaCoon My deepest sympathies to you and your family. We buried my grandson last year and you are right. This is something no parent should have to do. -wylfwt My condolences to you and your family. Let us know if there's anything that you need. -exzyle2k I am so so so sorry. Karma to you and yours, let me know if there is anything I can do -Madrigorne Condolences from Casa Grue, friend. - Grue Keep it together, man, karma from the 503 is yours. -Lusus Dammit. Tears and prayers from me and Kymster. -MeanDean Condolences from Villa Kennz -kennz My thoughts are with you n yours. Things like this really make us re-evaluate. - ThinTheHerd Not a call anyone would want. Our condolences ... we'll keep you in our prayers. -PCChaos thank you all. Taking it to the break room. -Captain Trips So sorry to hear, Lots of Karma coming your way... -Dr Jerkyl My sympathies to you and yours. There's nothing that can be said that hasn't been, but my heart goes out to you nonetheless. -Avandor Deepest sympathy on your loss, and love and support for you and your wife and your family. -ManyHats My sympathies to you and your family. Your title is correct. No parent should have to bury their child. Sending all karma I can spare. I hope things get better for you. - KrazerKap Surround yourself with family and friends. - AussieFoot Karmabats inbound at max speed. -TechnoVampire All to you and your family. Sorry to hear about it - PoglaTheGrate Condolences -Zimmerit Karma and Sympathies on its way. Have a safe trip -CrystalMare Karma and best wishes on the way. I am truly sorry. -Ramblin Fucking hell. Karma inbound, as well as whatever necessary to ease your burdens. - Grayhawk sorry this is so late- that's a bitch, dude. my condolences... - HappyCrappy
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13.
And why is this critical? Within 30 seconds of walking in the door today, I got a hair on fire ticket, saying a keyboard was loose on one of the mobile carts. I had enough time to down a few Twizzlers and drink some soda before heading up there. Good thing I did too.
I went up to where the person said the cart was... nowhere to be found, nor were any staff for that matter. I finally found someone and they directed me to a different cart that was working just fine. I spent the next 15 minutes in vain searching, and finally by chance, I saw the cart in question... in use by a doctor in the middle of what appeared to be a major meeting. I got the cart out of the conference room without too much of a hassle, and sure enough the railings for the keyboard tray had snapped, rendering the tray all but useless. It was a dead giveaway that someone leaned on the tray, since these weren't designed to hold up much more than 10 pounds, and thats pushing it.
So now, I have to wait for the nurse who put it in to do a report on who damaged it before we'll give her a replacement.[By: skippytpodar
/ 2010-09-03 ]
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Comments Probably her. This is the "he who smelt it, dealt it" rule of help desk tickets. -TechieSidhe "I don't know. I was just sitting here and heard some kind of plastic 'snap!', and then the keyboard wouldn't stay. I didn't DO ANYTHING!" *bitchbeats the fishie soundly bout the head and shoulders with the entire cart* - Seamus
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14.
It is almost done http://www.joystiq.com/2010/09/03/duke-nukem-forever-being-completed-by-gearbox-expected-next-yea/
Anyone got a copy of the orignals, cuz I have never played 'em.[By: DarkRookie / 2010-09-03]
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Comments Problem is, no matter how much awesome Gearbox eventually brings to the table, it's still not going to live up to a decade and a half of hype. - AmazingKreskin They even hired Axl Rose as a consultant to help them get the project finished on time. -Quark i - i just don't know.. Duke seems to have been soo distant these last .. decade and a bit.. i was hyped when i was 17, 18, 19. 20 i forgot about it... now - while Fallout 3 was freaking awsome.. i'm just not sure Duke will be the " OMFGBBQWTFROFLCOPERBBQ1" that its been promised to be. -Harm I doubt even a Vegas bookie would put odds on this actually happening. - Stryker One Duke Nukem 3D was the first computer game I remember playing. And honestly, I don't remember much aside from lots of shooting at things. - OgdenTechGuy http://www.destructoid.com/i-played-duke-nukem-forever-today-what-the-f-ck--183108.phtml&mainnav=Top+stories - ThinTheHerd Bollocks to that. I remember when Duke was two dimensional. I remember when your gun fired a short zig-zag that drilled its way toward the edge of the screen. And kissy-faced biting mouths on caterpillar treads climbing the walls. - Seamus I remember taking out security cameras, and taunting the big bad, "I'm gonna take you out, and be home in time to watch Oprah!" Yep, Duke said that. However, Gearbox and 2K made Borderlands which I see as fun and replayable shooting mayhem, so it's a good start. -Xal If you are still interested, you can buy the game at GOG.com for $6. They have the full game, DRM free, with DOSBox xconfigured to run and tested up to Win7. -PCGameGuy
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15.
Quick follow-up As a quick follow up to my story this morning, nobody's owned up so far to the broken keyboard tray, which has become symbolic due to the fact that this is a recurring problem. Doctors are blaming nurses, who are blaming doctors right back, and other people are simply saying that they reported it because there was a sign on the cart that it was broken.
I fired off a second e-mail, this time to the liasons for nursing and medicine, to be careful with the carts because the damage isn't covered by warranty, and that we're not responsible if someone leans on the tray, only for it to break, making them fall and crack their heads open. I think that wouldn't look too good on a report.[By: skippytpodar
/ 2010-09-03 ]
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Comments It's the work of the employee called "Nobody." I hate that. Just freaking admit you did it. I get more upset when I have to play detective than for someone to just come out and admit they did it. -TechieSidhe What if the rails were on a suspended arrangement that slowly clicked down, one step at a time, as weight was put on it, until it hit the 'reset point', and fired the damn thing up to the ceiling? Click, click, click, cl-WHAM! To them, it would seem to be random, keying to the addiction/aversion centers of the brain. -LDFeral I see "Not Me" and "Ida Know" have graduated from the 'Family Circus'.... - MadJack Where I work, they like to blame the student doctors. -Holdfast
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16.
Friday fun A couple of days ago $co-worker said $enduser was having problems with his email. Nothing was showing up in his sent box. The main $company support desk wasn’t able to help. The other state office computer support person couldn’t find anything wrong and shortly ago $co-worker couldn’t see anything wrong after looking at it for awhile. I went up and looked. $enduser had the reading pane set really big and I can’t stand it so closed it. Looked at things for oh, I don’t know, 30 seconds maybe. Clicked on the sent instead of from and guess what showed up.
The look on their faces was priceless.
[By: Rabbitt / 2010-09-03]
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17.
*pout pout* You won't upgrade me? Was amused by the woman that was all happy until she got to the point of her call, trying to get me to somehow sidestep the system's requirement that in order to upgrade your cell phone you have to have taken care of your past due amount. I get this call once a month, but she was special and passive-aggressively neeped in the direction of finding a new phone company and ending her contract early just because we wouldn't give her a $300 phone until she paid that $300 from June.[By: Mushroom / 2010-09-04]
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Comments The cancellation fee is - no doubt - at least $300.00. - ThinTheHerd I fscking can't stand this industry. I'd like to get back into PC support. At least the ratio of [self-entitled, white-collar mouthbreathers with delusions of intellect and megalomania] douchebags was lower. - Seamus
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18.
I want my twelve bucks back! Guy calls in to dispute a charge on his bill, and I agree that it's not valid so credit him back the $12. Fine, dandy. Then he asks me to return that money to his credit card. Uh, I am not capable of actually playing with money, so I try to dissuade him by mentioning his next bill comes out in a week and he'll see that as a credit against it. Nope, he wants it back right now. I pass him to the financial wing and wait on mute for the answer: Nope, they can't put it back on his card either, and there's really no point since he's going to be giving that back mere days later. The guy isn't giving up any ground, he wants that twelve bucks back on his card! And he says those magic words, "may I talk to your supervisor?", which is where I transferred this steaming pile away from me.[By: Mushroom / 2010-09-04]
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Comments I waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanttttttttttt myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy 1222222222222222222222 bucccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkks noooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!! -kennz It's my money and I want it now! -SpiderRider3 Poor dope - even if you could, voidsb and credits take 7-10 days to process, by which time he would have (hopefully) paid his bill. -Captain Trips I have never heard of places being able to put it on a person's credit card directly. If there is such a method, I have never come across it. Even if it exists, I wouldn't do it just because he's being rude. - KrazerKap tell him that you can have it refunded to his card immediately, but there is a $25 expedition charge. -razmann In his defense, having worked at a bank call center, if that $12 charge put him in overdraft/over-the-limit the bank might have been willing to refund his overage fees if and only if he got a credit back in the exact amount from you. That said... he was probably just an ass. >_> Oh and HI! I'm new. lol -Aelin236
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19.
Why can't you control my kid?? This woman called in to say she wants to use parental controls on her daughter's phone, which is something my employer offers on its family plans. The problem is that this phone is not on a family plan -- mother got daughter her own account and that's the only line on it. So I told her that no controls could be set unless another line was added to that account ("this isn't an option," she said) and that if we tried setting any sort of controls on that line it would be impractical because her daughter would be able to go to the website, click on 'Forgot Password', and a temporary password would be sent to her daughter's phone in a text message thus she'd be able to remove the controls herself.
Mother's angry response to this information was: "This is the sort of answer I always get from you people, you can't do what I want you to do." I believe this means she's asking the wrong things. [By: Mushroom / 2010-09-05]
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Comments "You can't do what I want you to do!" yes madam, that's the first correct thought you've had. - AussieFoot
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20.
Why can't I control my son?? Guy calls in to ask about the extra $100 charge on his bill. I go looking it up and it came down to this: His son had some average phone, and apparently found/bought/whatever an older model data phone somewhere and called in to have it put on his number. Son is not listed on the account as having permission to do anything, but means little since you can change devices through the telephone menu or online -- and not everyone asks for verification when someone requests to activate a replacement phone (which is 1/5 of our calls). The real goof-up here is not so much that his son changed phones without his consent, but that the agent who changed the device didn't notice that the $50 corporate data package was put on the line, rather than the $30 consumer data plan, and adding a smartphone causes the system to bill a month's data service in advance... ergo $100.
The irony was that father here starts bitching about how we could let his son make this change without his consent, especially since there's a password on the account to prevent this. "Well," I said, "looking at the notes on the change, he used your name and the account password was verified, so we made the change. I see that on this particular call you failed verification in our phone system." He didn't have much more to say after that, he just demanded that we suspend his son's phone... not a word spoken about refunds. [By: Mushroom / 2010-09-05]
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Comments But is he failed the verification, the you cannot disable his son's phone................ *smirk* - burrkiss
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