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End User Phrase of the Day

What the heck is a EUPOTD? it stands for 'End User Phrase Of The Day'! Here we are looking for small crazy things that customers have said to us during the day. As of today we have 19213 EUPOTD's.

19213. EU issue tracker comment of the day: "What is the ticket number for this fix?" Divert your gaze to the top of the screen, pal; it's the very one you're commenting on. [By :concept14 / 2015-03-26] [Top]
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19212. "We need help changing the toner in our scanner." ...Granted, it's an MFP so she's technically not incorrect, but it still made me blink a few times. [By :Mer / 2015-03-13] [Top]
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Comments

  • Ahh, the wonderful world of, "Sorry, no more toner in the printer so you can't scan to the PC. Go buy more toner despite not wanting to print anything!" -Calydor
  • well at least they didn't want black and white ink for their computer -Icelator
  • Sorry, but you're running low on blinker fluid. -Stryker One
  • 19211. This was in reference to a user trying to bump up a ticket and several of us calling shenanigans on it amongst ourselves:

    Me: And don't forget Rule #1: Users lie.
    $analyst: Don't be so cynical, skippy
    Me: Oh I'm past cynical!
    $analyst: Too many years out on the floor for you sir!

    Amen to that, and only a few thousand instances of users lying right through their teeth.
    [By : skippytpodar / 2015-03-10] [Top]
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    Comments

  • We really need to make a list of these up. That would be a bit of fun. Also wouldn't this be the zeroth rule since it would supersede any and all later ones. OOOO. Even better if we can make them like the robotic laws were the lower numbers supersede the higher ones. -DarkRookie
  • That would be fun. I'd add it to the forum, but it's a crying shame it's down. I've toyed with the idea of doing a site of my own, maybe calling it "Bitter IT Techs.com" "or Cynical IT Techs.com" "IT Burnout.com", or something along those lines. -skippytpodar
  • He has the truth of it. -HappyCrappy
  • 19210. Dev Ops Manager POTD: "One of our file servers caught something. We hope it's flu not ebola." [By :concept14 / 2015-02-26] [Top]
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    Comments

  • This is why you wear latex when working on a strangers machine. -Stryker One
  • I like the analogy! -Voz
  • 19209. After I ask the client to forward a bounce message: "Okay, so then I can go ahead and delete this stuff where it says "admin diagnotic information before I send it, right?"s [By :LaFiamma / 2015-01-24] [Top]
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    Comments

  • Yeah, it's not like that contains anything useful. I used to take calls about bounced e-mails, when I finally saw the message it said "recipient's mailbox full." And the user would always want me to fix it - on the vendor's system. -Captain Trips
  • I love those. Or when it says that the maximum allowed message size has been exceeded and they're like "Can't you just let it through?" -LaFiamma
  • Official Policy at the office now (at least local to our office) is to just dump message size complaints unanswered. Eventually they quit sending those complaints to us and call the Agency Helpdesk, where they get crabbed at for being Special Snowflakes while being reminded of the message and mailbox limits. -Grue
  • When they say that 10mb is a bit small nowadays, they are right though. -Holdfast
  • 19208. Co-worker POTD: Hold on. Jesus is buffering. [By :KrazerKap / 2015-01-08] [Top]
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    19207. HAPPY NEW YEAR ALL!!! [By :beatmewithstick / 2014-12-31] [Top]
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    19206. me: "...And thank you for calling Dildotronics!" caller: "You do the same!" [By :Mushroom / 2014-12-26] [Top]
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    19205. "Do you have a PC or Mac?" "Yes" The analyst was on with this user for 40 minutes for a very simple process. [By :Starfury / 2014-12-23] [Top]
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    Comments

  • "How many lights are lit on the DSL modem?" "Yes." - just keep the pitchers coming. -Harm
  • 19204. BossPOTD: "I've called IT to disable your windows." (Translation: Though I have no idea how you're keeping up on the score of a live game, like half the office is also doing, I'm going to use my Pointy Hair powers to magically make this stop... somehow.) [By :Mushroom / 2014-12-23] [Top]
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  • Yay thanks boss now I can focus on the game I'm watching on my cell phone and not do anymore work. -deedadee
  • pffff -Madrigorne
  • 19203. Coworker POTD: "If my chesticles were smaller, I'd buy [brand of sport bra my retailer offers]." This choked me not only because she used the word 'chesticles' but because the largest size they make is 32 inches around and she's upwards of 40, so her cup size ain't the real reason. [By :Mushroom / 2014-12-19] [Top]
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    Comments

  • Gotta love it. *grin* -Grue
  • So ... Her cups runneth over then ? -Necros
  • More like her gut runneth over, her cups are C-D. -Mushroom
  • Show me more EUPOTD's in groups of: 10 50 100

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