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Customer Misconceptions

The 'Customer Misconception List' has been part of TSC since it's beginning. When you work in tech support you hear the craziest things, the EU's mind is frightening at times to say the least. From the user who believes in the mysterious Windows 96 to the one who thinks the help desk phone number is the one their computer should dial, we hear them all. If you know of a customer misconception, add it to the list. The total number of customer misconceptions that have been submitted to TSC is a whopping 8328!

8328. We do not have an "easy" button that we can press to fix problems on your computer. Some things just take time...no matter how much you 'need it fixed now.' Asking over and over if there's an "instant fix" will not change my answer from "no" to "yes." If I had an easy/fast fix don't you think I'd just run it? [By :Starfury / 2015-04-01] [Top]
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  • I hate these. Worse yet is when you pause for a few seconds, they ask "Are you new? Do you even KNOW how to fix this?" (The one time I got that, I replied, "I've been here six years, but I guess we've never spoken before. And the reason I paused isn't because I don't know how to fix the issue, but was trying to decide the best way to fix it." She shut up.) -Captain Trips
  • What I wish I could say: Q: "Is there any way I could get it sooner?" A: "Ask for it sooner." -concept14
  • 8327. Calling in 6 minutes before a meeting to find out if a conference room has wired internet access is just fine. The help desk keeps track of ALL the conference rooms including your site which is 3000 miles away..including whether or not the wired connection has been configured for internal or external access. [By :Starfury / 2015-03-25] [Top]
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  • SSR (Standard Sarcastic Response): Sure... -unrenowned
  • 8326. If you bookmark an error page for a website that is the page that will come up when you click the link. The computer isn't smart enough to know that you want to go to the log on page instead. [By :Starfury / 2015-03-23] [Top]
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  • And yet the computer is still the smarter one in this scenario. -concept14
  • 8325. Needing a mouse replaced is a "patient care" critical item requiring the local on call to come in, get two hours of overtime, instead of you moving your lazy behind to the functional computer 5 feet away...

    I WANT A NEW MOOOOOUUUSSSEE!
    [By : skippytpodar / 2015-03-16] [Top]
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    8324. Former job had me installing security cameras. In one building, I had to install them over the entrance... A door that faced west and had several trees in front of it. At a certain time of day, the shadow would fall across the viewing area, making it hard to see certain details. Fishy asked me if something could be done about that. OH YES, LET ME GET STARTED ON MOVING THE SUN!!! [By :linkv / 2015-03-05] [Top]
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  • How about a fill light? -Captain Trips
  • Chainsaw? -Stryker One
  • You've got it backwards. The problem is that the sun *is* moving. You have to stop it at once! /s -RDMcMains
  • 8323. Why am I supposed to be upset when you threatend "I'M ABOUT READY TO THROW IT OUT THA WINDOW!!!" when you get mad at your computer? You're not threatening to throw *me* out the window, after all, and I'd have you in jail if you did. And if you did throw your computer out the window, you wouldn't have a computer anymore, and therefore would have no reason to talk to me. So it's a win-win for me. [By :linkv / 2015-02-19] [Top]
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  • "What it mean, 'PC LOAD LETTER'?" -Captain Trips
  • 8322. If you are going to steal lottery tickets, for the love of Cthulu, don't redeem the winning tickets in the store you work at. C'mon, you're making this too easy. Also arrested in the store and escorted out in cuffs. [By : RiffRaff / 2015-02-18] [Top]
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  • Been spending too much time on facebook. I was looking for the "like" button... -Captain Trips
  • More Morons Abound! -Grue
  • 8321. One computer having trouble connecting to the wireless LAN constitutes a Regional emergency requiring overtime, conference calls, etc. [By : skippytpodar / 2015-01-19] [Top]
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  • Gotta love it.... -Grue
  • Seems to be par for the course here -DarkRookie
  • Well, if they're willing to pay the bill for that level of service.... -Stryker One
  • Well, if it's the CEO's computer his secretary prints out his e-mails from, then yes - it is an emergency. -Captain Trips
  • 8320. Actually a boss misconception - let's remove 5 agents from your team and then wonder why we fell so behind in getting work orders sent out....hmmmm. Let's not consider that we also lost 3 agents prior to that that you didn't have the budget to replace. Let's increase our customer base by 100 000 people in the last 12 months. Let's add 3 new systems to deal with. But obviously we must just be slackers and are goofing off instead of working. [By :frprinterwiz / 2014-12-29] [Top]
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    8319. We at <company> helpdesk are going to assist you with your home network setup because we know everything about your hardware...even if you don't have a clue. In reality our troubleshooting (by policy) is pretty much limited to "Try turning it off and on again." There are MANY reasons for this but the primary is that we don't want to become your home network support center. [By :Starfury / 2014-12-29] [Top]
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    8318. When you call in at 2am Saturday morning because you've traveled to Japan and didn't let us know before you left I'll be able to make your phone work. I am sorry that the analyst that you spoke to on Friday (company holiday) screwed up and didn't do more than open/transfer/close the ticket before getting confirmation that the work was done...but I can't do anything about it now other than send an email and hope that someone will work on it in the morning our time. [By :Starfury / 2014-12-27] [Top]
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  • Yeah...right..."whoops!" -Grue
  • Best part: Not my ticket. So when I re-opened the ticket the original analyst will get the inevitable negative survey since he messed up in the first place. I've been here long enough to know how to work the system. -Starfury
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